With his fingers firmly pressed into the back of my arm, Todd urged me to move toward the exit. “Say goodbye and let’s go,” he said forcefully.
He was right.
“Bye, Lucas. Mommy loves you and I’ll be back to get you very soon.”
“Bye, Mommy,” was all I got in return as he scurried around the playground.
Don’t linger, I kept repeating in my head all morning. Don’t make it hard on him. Wait until you get back to the car to cry.
And cry I did.
But mostly, for me.
My little boy is in school!
I kept my phone close to me on vibrate and with the ringer turned up to the maximum volume for the three hours we were apart, fully expecting a call from the school begging me to come pick up my son because he missed me so much.
Alas, the phone didn’t ring.
When I arrived 15 minutes before I was due, I saw my little boy sitting contently in the lap of the teacher’s aid. Feelings of guilt, relief, surprise and happiness washed over me.
He was fine.
He did it!
We both did.
We made through Day 1.
As soon as he saw me, his eyes lit up like a Christmas tree and he rushed over to me, careful not to step on any of the napping bodies that covered the floor. And then all I felt was grateful. Grateful that I was able to bring him home and not have to keep him there the rest of the day like so many other working mothers have to. What a sight for sore eyes.
I know I kissed and hugged him a little more than usual that day, so proud of him. So full of love.
I missed Day 2 because I was at BlogHer, but I heard Lucas did equally as well.
This week has been a bit harder and there have been some tears, requests for Mommy and his lovey, which his teacher says is normal for week 2. Today he asked if he could take his lovey tomorrow “…to have in his cubby”, just in case. I think that can be arranged.
We are all getting used to a new schedule, time apart and having a student in the house. One thing I won’t have any trouble getting used to are the art projects my little buddy hands me with so much pride in his eyes.
Ah, be still my heart: