My Letters For You guest today is Erin of My Little Miracles. This woman is a true survivor and has a thing or two to say to prematurity in preemies and does it with only the grace and stye that a mother can.
Please welcome Erin!
Dear Prematurity in Babies (in particular MY baby),
You think that you may have won, laughing at me all the way. Bringing my baby, my youngest into the world 8 weeks early. Were you trying to prove something? Did you just want there to be another Virgo in the household? Maybe you knew we had just bought out house 2 weeks prior and were scheduled to move the day after you threw my youngest into the world?
You have done several things in bringing him into the world so early; you have made me fiercely over protective of my baby. I worry about him constantly, he didn’t meet “normal” milestones. He didn’t crawl until almost a year, I had to carry him everywhere until he was 18 months. At 2 he still wasn’t talking. We went through testing for autism followed by speech therapy and countless sleepless nights wondering if I was a good mommy.
You brought him into this world not breathing, you gave him a narrowed airway and to top it all off you threw in a little asthma. Thought that would be fun did you?
Because of you we have spent to many days in the hospital for RSV, more than enough hours in the ER, way to many nights being woke up in the middle of the night by that croupy cough and that struggle for breath that sends us running and we have had our share of breathing treatments, steroids, antibiotics and worry.
But two things you didn’t count on, Me being his mom, and Him being able to stand up to you. Aside from all that you have done to try and strip me of my happiness with him, and drain his spirit for life, you have failed, miserably.
You may get him down and out every now and again, and you may have me up worrying and crying for all that he may be missing out on. A childhood where he sometimes needs to say “I can’t run and play today with the other kids because I have asthma”.
I wanted to let you know a few things you failed to do, you failed to destroy the bond that he and I will always have. You haven’t taken away his ambition and his strive to be everything he was meant to be. And most importantly, despite all the oxygen you have deprived him of, he is the smartest 3.5 year old little boy and only getting smarter!
If that isn’t the biggest flip of the bird from him to you, I don’t know what is!
You really should think next time you bring another baby into the world before they are ready, because they will give you a run for your money!
Have a nice day!
Erin, mother to a precious preemie.