She slowly makes her way down my leg.
Groping and grasping.
I’m glad I shaved my legs or this would be a painful journey.
Her tiny hands were working hard.
She thrusts her small body inch by inch.
On a mission after my pink toenails it would seem.
She finds them and plays with them a little and then her chubby fingers discover the two small black stars on top of my right foot.
She looks back up at me as if to ask for help. “They don’t come off,” I say knowing she won’t understand.
She traces the stars one by one. Her touch is tender and the sweetness of the act makes tear up.
Someday I’d have to tell her the significance of the stars, who they are for, the story behind the tattoos. My stomach turns to ice.
Maybe I’ll be able to avoid it and her brother will tell her before I have the chance. I think about how that conversation might go: So, you know how we never see mom’s parents? They died. She doesn’t like to talk about it.
It should come from me I decide.
And it will.
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Definitely tell her as soon as she is old enough to ask you. You’ll know at the time how much detail to give, and the details can unfold as she ages. xoxo
Questions from kids are hard. Sometimes, impossible. But, you’re right….you’re the best one to answer. <3
This is such a tough topic. I know that when the time comes, you will find the words to tell her. xo
If you do night time prayers … you can always start blessing them in Heaven, or start telling it as a story, so it becomes familiar, so familiar that when you tell the whole story … it doesn’t break your heart xxxx
Death and loss are such hard topics. And yet, love is stronger, memories are stronger and the stories you tell them about the stars in the sky and in your heart will make the story happier and memorable.
I know how hard it is and so my heart is with yours…but I know that your words will be right and good. Love to all of you always.
This was so beautifully written…i was crying before the final word. xo
I love that she touched them tenderly.
It should come from you, and it will. When the time is right.
Maybe she will ask Lucas one day about mom and dad and he will explain it to her….. ?