Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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Every Day Is Earth Day

Posted on April 21, 2010 Written by Tonya

I know tomorrow is Earth Day, but I will be flying over the Pacific, so I wanted to post this today.

Forty years after the first Earth Day, the world is in greater peril than ever. While climate change is the greatest challenge of our time, it also presents the greatest opportunity – to build a healthy, prosperous, clean energy economy now and for the future.

Let this Earth Day inspire you to do something to reduce your carbon footprint. Even if it means taking baby steps, there are plenty of things we can do to make a difference.

Listed here are ten simple things you can do to reduce your carbon footprint on Earth Day.

1. For one day, eat no disposable food items or beverages. Add to that no paper plates, plastic utensils or other disposable dinnerware. We all have cupboards full of dishes and glasses that we pass on when we grab a paper plate for that quick snack. For just one day, pass on the paper products.

2. Pay your bills online. And while you are at it, opt for receiving your billing statements by e-mail instead of snail mail.

3. Adjust the thermostat. Cut back on your heating and air conditioning by lowering your thermostat in the winter and moving it up a notch or two in the summer. Just a couple degrees in either direction can really make a difference in your energy use.

4. Cook one meal entirely from organic non-processed ingredients. It’s easier than you think and will be healthier in the process.

5. Lose the plastic water bottles. These leave a huge carbon footprint. Purchase a reusable bottle or canteen for your water.

6. Change your light bulbs. Purchase compact florescent light bulbs instead of incandescent light bulbs. The compact florescent bulbs use less energy and last longer. According to the EPA, “An ENERGY STAR qualified compact fluorescent light bulb (CFL) will save about $30 over its lifetime and pay for itself in about 6 months. It uses 75% less energy and lasts about 10 times longer than an incandescent bulb.”

7. Only use your clothes washer, washing machine and dishwasher when they are completely full. Using them fully loaded means you utilize them less thus using less energy. Think of it as doing less loads of laundry and fewer times to unload the dishwasher.

8. Read the newspaper online. By doing this you use less paper and save trees.

9. Use a laptop instead of a desktop model computer. Buy using a laptop computer your energy savings could range from 50 to 80 percent.

10. Unplug your phone charger when not in use. This applies to other appliances as well. Many plugged in appliances continue to draw energy even when not in use.

In our home we practice at least six of the above actions on a day to day basis and one I’d add is using reuseable bags. I made it a New Year’s resolution and now it’s a habit. It is little, simple changes that can make a big impact.

I sincerely hope by the time you are old enough to read this that Mother Earth is in much better shape than she is today.

The best is yet to be.

Day 57/100

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Filed Under: change, current events

Keeping Our Children Safe

Posted on March 15, 2010 Written by Tonya

People in San Diego are understandably enraged and confused: a convicted sex offender (who, in the past, had beaten and raped young girls and got only five years in prison) was let out on parole…to rape and kill a young woman again.

This is a heartbreaking story and I, too am outraged and very scared for my child’s safety.

Thousands Gather to Mourn Chelsea King
Outpouring of Grief Revitalizes Shaken Community at Teen’s Memorial Service

By Lisa Fletcher
POWAY, Calif., March 13, 2010

More than 6,000 mourners held sunflowers tied with blue ribbons as they said goodbye to Chelsea King, the straight-A student and cross-country runner who was known for her kindness and compassion.

“She was a person who brought sunshine and light to school every day,” said Dakota Douglas, Chelsea’s friend and cross-country teammate. “She was an incredible person, was nice to everyone. I just can’t believe that she’s gone. School’s not the same without her.”

King, known for her gentle spirit, helped plan a prom for developmentally disabled kids, packed relief boxes for those in need in Africa and served as a peer counselor at her school.

During the memorial, a giant monitor over the high school football field reminisced of happier days — Chelsea laughing with her friends, loving life. The school band filled the air with music; Chelsea had played the French horn in the band.

As everyone grieved, there was a message of hope. This strongly Christian community praying together that something good would ultimately come from something tragic, that laws would change, eyes would be opened and accountability would be had.

Chelsea went missing while running in a Rancho Bernardo park last month, just outside of San Diego. Thousands in this close-knit community turned out to search for her. Volunteers passed out flyers by the thousands and tied blue ribbons on trees across the city to remind people she was missing.

This community is now turning that same energy into demands for change — outraged that a paroled sex offender may have slipped through bureaucratic cracks.

“This is just an assault to everybody’s child,” said Christy Georgedes, as she choked back tears. “I’ve got three daughters and she’s my fourth daughter, and this is going to stop! So we’re going to show our love today but after that, beware. You just watch how powerful things are going to get.”

Parents we spoke with say they will do anything within their power to change the laws if necessary, but most of all they will demand accountability from those whose job it is to track the whereabouts of convicted predators.

Police arrested convicted sex offender John Gardner three days after Chelsea’s disappearance. Two days later, her body was discovered in a shallow grave.

Terri Francy, who has kids at Poway High School, told us this community won’t stop until families have the protection they deserve.

“Seven times that he [Gardner] violated parole and had they got him, had they put him behind bars where he should have been, then he wouldn’t have been out there to commit this crime,” Francy said. “I hate to live in the ‘what ifs’ and ‘it shouldn’t have happened,’ but it’s true. It shouldn’t have happened. We want to stop it now.”

It is unclear whether Gardner violated his parole or whether the state didn’t properly track him. But enough questions have been raised that on Friday, Gov. Schwarzenegger ordered a probe into the way the state handled Gardner’s case.

Officials say that Gardner, who’s now charged in Chelsea’s death, is also the focus in the murder investigation of 14-year-old Amber DuBois, whose body was found in a neighboring community last Saturday.

Gardner was released early from prison in 2005, after molesting a 13-year-old girl.
_______________________________________________

My friend Wendi sent me a link to the Web site Family Watchdog and I was shocked to find that there are 15 (!!) registered sex offenders within a five mile radius of my house!

As a parent, it is our job to keep our children safe. We have to do our best to prepare them in case they are ever in danger or threatened in any way. I have a nine month old and I’m already thinking about this stuff!

I’m afraid these days, it goes a lot further than “Don’t talk to strangers” and “Look both ways before crossing the street”. There’s Internet stalking, identity theft, bullying, child predators in our parks and playgrounds, child abductors, substance abuse, etc., etc., etc. How do I teach my son to be safe without frightening him? It’s enough to make you want to put a GPS tracking device in your child!

A parent should never ever ever have to bury a child. My heart goes out to the parents of Chelsea King. May they find peace.

The best is yet to be.

Day 20/100

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Filed Under: current events, parenting, safety

GaGa For GaGa

Posted on January 23, 2010 Written by Tonya

Sometimes, I’m the last to jump on the band wagon. For example, people told me for years how much I’d love the TV shows Grey’s Anatomy and Brothers and Sisters, that I would thoroughly enjoy reconnecting and staying connected to friends on Facebook, that if I tried acai berry juice, I might just enjoy it, and that if I got an iPhone, I would get used to it and learn to love it. In each instance, I was stubborn and resisted and held out, until one day…I tried all of those things and now, can’t imagine my life without them. As strange as it may sound, appreciating Lady GaGa is no exception.

I had heard Lady GaGa’s music at the gym and on the radio and knew my sister dressed up as her for her Halloween last year (I’m still not sure what a disco stick is) and I thought she was just another wannabe Madonna, along the lines of Britney and Christina. It was actually your dad, who I feel has the strangest taste in music, that made me really take notice.

I believe Lady GaGa is a genius.

Say what you will about her outlandish make-up, daring fashion sense and shocking and sexually charged performances, Lady GaGa’s music is absolutely infectious. If you can’t get the chorus of Bad Romance out of your head, you are a better person that I am.

She’s talented, too. She writes her own lyrics, plays classic piano and obviously designs her own wardrobe. I believe that she likes to push boundaries but doesn’t just shock for shock’s sake. So, what message does she want to send? In a recent interview she said, “I want them [my fans] to free themselves, and I want them to be proud of who they are. I want them to celebrate all the things they don’t like about themselves the way that I did, and to be truly happy from the inside.”

She’s the most successful 23 year old I know. Lady GaGa’s latest smash hit, Bad Romance, has set the record for the most weekly plays registered in Billboard’s Pop Songs radio airplay tally history. Last week, the song was played 10,859 times across the nation, knocking Leona Lewis out of her titled position (in 2008, Bleeding Love was played 10,665 times in one week).

Lady GaGa’s hit single Just Dance has just gone platinum five times over. It is the first song EVER by a female artist to surpass 5 million downloads!

If you are still reluctant to jump on the wagon yourself, think she’s too “out there”, or aren’t into electronic dance music, listen to her ballad Speechless. I guarantee it will knock your socks off.

The best is yet to be if you just dance!

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Filed Under: current events, music

Yes We Can!

Posted on January 20, 2010 Written by Tonya

“I’m asking you to believe. Not just in my ability to bring about change to Washington…I’m asking you to believe in yours.” – Barack Obama

I followed Obama’s campaign diligently while I was pregnant with you and found out he had won the presidency while at a Madonna concert at Petco Park.

I am a sucker for celebrating milestones and today is a big one. One year ago today, President Barack Obama became the nation’s 44th president.

In the 365 days since, the president’s approval ratings have dropped from their high water mark at 69% to 50%, according to a Gallup poll.

To be fair, Obama inherited an enormous mess; an eight year old war, a failing economy, and a nightmare health care system.

Despite the challenges Obama faced at his inauguration and compromises he’s made on issues, I think things could have been worse if the other candidate had been elected.

Love him or hate him, Democrat or Republican, I think you’ll agree that these are amazing First Year photos taken by photographer Pete Souza, the current chief White House photographer.

The best is yet to be.

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Filed Under: current events, milestones

Disaster In Haiti

Posted on January 15, 2010 Written by Tonya

On Tuesday, January 12 a devastating 7.0-magnitude earthquake hit Port-au-Price, Haiti. It is estimated that about three million people were affected by the quake and about 45,000–50,000 people were killed.

Christa Brelsford, a student from Arizona State University, lost a leg after being trapped under a collapsed building. She was one of the lucky ones.

Matt Lauer spoke to Brelsford this morning on The Today Show and I encourage you to watch the interview and read about her ordeal here. Let this brave woman be an example for all of us!

I donated to the Red Cross through one of the most amazing fundraising campaigns I have ever heard of or participated in, done solely through text messages. It was already stunning Red Cross officials on Thursday when it hit $3 million. By this morning, the tally had more than doubled! The campaign, made viral on networking sites like Twitter and Facebook, has raised $8 million according to a Twitter message from the White House that was reposted on the Red CrossWeb site.

If you are feeling generous and would like to help Haiti earthquake victims, please visit thislist of charitiesor do what I did and text 909-99 to make a $10 contribution.

The best is yet to be and my heart and thoughts go out to all the earthquake victims.

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Filed Under: current events, donation Tagged With: current events, donation

2009: A Year To Remember

Posted on December 20, 2009 Written by Tonya

With less than two weeks in 2009, I am reflecting on the past 12 months and I know without a doubt that this year will always be a very special year for me because it was the year you were born, but there were other personal highlights for me too:

January – I got an SUV, my first step on the road to mommyville.
February – A glorious and life changing week at Canyon Ranch.
March – A dreaded, but necessary trip to my father’s hometown of Shamrock, TX, which reconnected me to family.
March – The difficult and heartbreaking task of emptying my parents house and having an estate sale.
April – A very fun long Easter weekend spent dog sitting Winston, who I completely fell in love with and still miss.
March – May – A slew of first time parenting classes, seminars and lectures that in no way prepared me for the “real” thing.
April – Two lovingly hosted baby showers.
June – Your birth.
June – December – Getting to know my mother-in-law better.
July – Seeing Coldplay in concert (this was also the night of your first babysitter).
July – Trapeze school for my friend, Wendi’s 40th birthday.
September – Seeing Dave Matthews Band in concert (no yearly list of highlights would be complete without this). 🙂
February and September – Having two good friends give birth to their own little bundles of joy.
October – A short but very sweet visit from my aunt and uncle.
October – Seeing “The Lion King” on stage.
November – Our first family trip to Florence, Italy.
December – A 24 hour overnight date at the Hard Rock Hotel with your dad.

On a global scale, from a boy not in a balloon, to the inauguration of the nation’s 44th president, 2009 saw big and not so big stories dominate airwaves and front pages.

Here are just a few that I will remember (with help from The Huffington Post):

Miracle on the Hudson – January 15
Pilot makes emergency “splashdown” landing in Hudson River after aircraft suffers a “double bird strike.” All passengers and crew members survive. Pilot C.B. “Sully” Sullenberger becomes a hero.

Obama Sworn In – January 20
Barack Obama becomes the nation’s 44th president.

Madoff’s Multi-Billion Dollar Ponzi Scheme – March
Disgraced financier Bernard Madoff is sentenced to 150 years in prison for defrauding private investors and charities of billions over the course of his career. Many lose their life savings.

Michael Jackson’s Death – June 25
The death of the self-proclaimed King of Pop stands out in a summer of notable deaths. Jackson’s passing at age 50 was is as dramatic and theatrical as the performer’s life and includes accusations of murder at the hands of a private physician. Los Angeles prosecutors say any charges relating to Jackson’s death will come in 2010.

Sotomayor Becomes Supreme Court Justice – August 6
Justice Sonia Sotomayor becomes the nation’s first Hispanic person to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court. The former appeals court judge is Obama’s first nomination to the court and is confirmed despite efforts to block her nomination over comments she made about race in the courtroom. Sotomayor is the third woman to serve on the bench of the country’s highest court.

Sen. Ted Kennedy Dies – August 25
Longtime Senator from Massachusetts dies after battling brain cancer.

Jaycee Dugard Kidnapping – August 26
Jaycee Dugard is discovered alive after being kidnapped 18 years ago.

Balloon Boy – October 15
Falcon Heene makes headlines when his parents report that a helium-filled balloon floated away with the boy inside. The boy is later found safe in his family’s attic, but the ensuing media frenzy exposes cracks in the family’s story and Heene’s parents, reality TV wannabes, are charged with making false statements.

Fort Hood Shooting – November 5
13 die in an attack at Fort Hood in Texas, when Army psychiatrist Maj. Nidal Hasan allegedly opens fire.

Health Care Reform
– November 7
A plan to reform America’s health care system moves forward in congress.

Gay Marriage Gains And Losses
Same-sex marriage gains approval in Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Washington D.C. It is rejected by voters in Maine and by the New York legislature.

U.S. Economy
High unemployment, slow economic growth, and high foreclosure rates persist despite stimulus package and bank bailouts.

Detroit Bailout
US automakers GM and Chrysler are bailed out by federal government.

Swine Flu, Vaccination Shortages
Swine Flu outbreak in Mexico becomes global pandemic. H1N1 vaccination production, delivery in US falls short of expectations.

Afghan War & Afghan Elections
Hamid Karzai is sworn in for second term as president after election opponent withdraws from runoff. President Obama deliberates over troop levels in Afghanistan and decides to escalate war with surge of 30,000 more American troops.

Iraq Draw-Down
Conditions improve but bombings persist as US forces prepare to end combat operations by August of 2010 and withdraw completely by 2012.

The best is yet to be and here’s looking forward to all that lies ahead in 2010.

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Filed Under: current events, list, Winston

Brothers

Posted on December 19, 2009 Written by Tonya

Today’s post has nothing to do with raising Lucas, but it has everything to do with family. My sister and I saw the movie Brothers the other night and it was amazing.

A remake of the 2004 Swedish film, Bröder, the trio of Jake Gyllenhaal, Tobey Maguire and Natalie Portman was a draw for me and from an acting standpoint, they did not disappoint. The script gives Macguire the most to work with as the family man/Marine, Capt. Sam Cahill, whose latest trip to Afghanistan sees him imprisoned by the Taliban and ultimately returned to America with some serious psychological issues. While he is MIA, his wife, Grace, (Portman) and ex-con brother, Tommy, (Gyllenhaal) are told he is dead, and the two grow closer, eventually verging on emotional and physical attachment.

Watching these three individuals go through their personal journeys is heartbreaking and beautiful, especially that of Cahill. I wasn’t expecting to be so emotionally attached or moved by this film. It was very thought provoking for me and made me realize that war affects more than just the solider, it takes its toll on the entire family and all of those left behind. In many ways, I think it’s harder for those left waiting at home for the safe return of their loved one.

I highly recommend this movie hope Tobey Maguire wins the Golden Globe for Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture (Drama) for his stunning performance.

I am thankful that I don’t know anyone involved in the war in any way, but I know that I am in the minority. I am ashamed to admit that I’m not even sure why we are fighting. I know that it is mainly in response to the September 11, 2001 attacks on the US, but I believe that the conflict is much deeper and older than that.

It blows my mind that we are in year nine of the war in Afghanistan and currently have 70,000 U.S. military personnel stationed there. Now, that’s something to think about! Or what about the sobering fact that as of today, December 19, 2009 we have lost 5,288 soldiers. 4,356 in Operation Iraqi Freedom and 932 in Operation Enduring Freedom. That’s 5,288 souls too many.

The best is yet to be. May peace on earth be near.

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Filed Under: current events, movie review, war Tagged With: current events, movie review, war

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