Since I was 17, I’ve lived in a perpetual state of missing someone or something.
Topping my list has always has been my parents.
At 17, I went to boarding school for my senior year of high school and never lived under the same roof as them again. I missed them (and my sister) tremendously, but relished in “being on my own” for the first time.
After high school, there was college and still many miles between me and my family. We would spend time together during the holidays and throughout the summer, but I never had enough time with them.
My parents died in 2007 and I think about them and wish they were here every single day. I doubt that longing will never go away.
I missed school after I graduated. Both high school and college. I enjoyed school. I was good at it, especially the social aspect. Go figure!
Even though she’s only an hour away, I miss my sister.
I miss friends that I wish lived next door, in particular my oldest and dearest, friend Sophie.
Lucas met Sophie in New Caledonia in April, 2010.
Since becoming a mother, my desires are simpler, in no particular order here’s what’s missing from my life these days:
1. Sleep. In particular, sleeping in.
2. Grab and gos. The ability to go anywhere without a huge production, whether that means, packing snacks, diapers, struggling to put on someone’s shoes or booking a sitter. I miss the days of just grabbing my purse and going.
3. Living guilt free. I’ve learned guilt comes with the mom territory in many forms and there is no escape…. am I spending enough time with him, is he watching too much TV, am I exposing him to the right activities for his age, how can I get more vegetables into his diet, etc., etc., etc.?
4. Watching TV. Whatever I want, whenever I want.
5. My own name. All I hear any more is “Mommy!”. And “no!”.
6. Did I mention sleep?
7. The sounds of silence. See #5.
8. Yoga. I am going to get back to a regular practice if it kills me. I joined a yoga studio four months ago and have only taken two classes.
9. Going to the bathroom. Alone.
10. Dinner. Easting at home is rushed, eating out is rushed. I miss long, leisurely dinners that were several courses long and lasted longer than an hour.
This post was inspired by Stasha’s Monday Listicles, a linky right up my alley! This week’s topic is 10 I Miss.
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Want to have a speed eating contest? Me either, but I’d totally kick your ass. It’s embarrassing really the ability I have to inhale my food before somebody needs me for something.
We eat a lot of limp salads in our house. Sigh.
Thank you for sharing the story of living away from your parents and how much you missed them when you were young. I can only imagine how you must have been experiencing the emotions of being on your own and the excitement from that but also missing the love and protection and reassurance from your parents. Until I met my husband, when I was 26, I continual felt a pang of homesickness every so often, really needing my parents. It’s so hard to become an adult in some ways.
And now we’re moms, too, and I really miss silence a lot. I try to remind myself that I am going to miss my four-year-old’s non-stop all-day-long chatter one day. She said to me the other day, after talking for over 20 minutes non-stop, “Let’s see, what else can I talk about?”
It’s really cute that she wants to talk so much, but oh my, to be asked to listen and reply to everything she says takes a lot of energy out of me 🙂 But then when I get the silence I miss her voice.
Thank you for sharing this post with us! It really made me think about my parents and what I miss the most.
Thank you for reading!
Silence is certainly golden. 🙂 And parents are pretty spectacular.
I would have to add to this list “drinking a cup of coffee while it is still hot”
I’m not a coffee drinker, but I completely understand. 🙂
I miss eating hot meals! And going to the bathroom alone? I think we have a long time before that happens again!
I am all alone like you and the first time in years I truly missed my family was when I became a mother. I am an adult and at peace with life challenges but I sometimes feel sad for my son never having grandparents or uncles and aunts on my side of the family.
Ten mommy misses? YES, all ten. The day my son sat at a dinner table with us was the last day I had a hot meal, start to finish… The guilt, the operation leaving the house… And the silence. Much like Kim’s chatter box daugter mine said in the car the other day ‘Mama, I got something to tell you. I really like to talk.’ You don’t say?!
The incessant noise is enough to make me want to poke my eyes out with a fork sometimes. It’s darling and entertaining and sometimes insightful, but it never stops!
Great prompt this week, Stasha!
Oh I miss all those things too, and yes, sleep – twice too! Grab and go was what I took for granted before I had my kids – how very easy it was then and I didn’t even give it a thought. I’m sorry to know how much you miss your parents so. Both my parents are still alive and I’m really thankful for that. It’s a great reminder here that life is short and that we should always cherish every moment we have with our loved ones. Thank you.
You know, the going to the bathroom one–why do they never mention that one in the parenting books? It seems ridiculous, but one of my favorite parts of going on business trips is privacy in the bathroom!
I so miss long dinners where I don’t have to tell people what is appropriate and inappropriate.
Great list!
You know, I got so used to rushing through meals, that I just realized, we never have those leisurely dinners either, even though Mini-Me has been out of the house for almost a year now!
Me too. To all of these. Although I don’t hear “Mom” yet, but the rest of them, totally. Sleeping in. Eating out without having to put food in another person’s mouth. Etc!!
I’m with you on the sleeping, the getting up and just going, the going to the bathroom alone, aw heck – my list pretty much looks likes yours!
I guess as Mother’s it’s no surprise we end up missing the same things:)
You are so spot on. How did I miss all of these things on my list? I’ll have to add them in! Include: Sleeping whenever I like.
i was just telling my husband how nice it would be to have family nearby. we could drop our son off and actually sleep in for once. i miss that too.
Wow! Where have I been?! I love the new look of your blog!! I also love Scrabble 😉
I can relate to those to…it goes so fast though, that in a few years, our lists will be that we miss the kids not letting us sleep, and remember when we could never go to the bathroom alone? My oldest is already acting like a teenager…something I’m not prepared for yet.
Thanks! I’m still getting used to WordPress, but I love my new design too. 🙂
My 2 year old acts way beyond his years some days too. Scary, isn’t it?
I found myself nodding along as I read your list. Sleep, peeing with the door shut, running out the door, those things I took for granted of prior to motherhood!
Wouldn’t trade motherhood for anything in the world, but I think it’s okay to miss the simpler days of get up and go… Isn’t it?
–Oh, that “longing” never leaves, does it? CRAVINGS…I truly identified with this post.
The grab and gos. It is missed by me too. It is amazing just by going to the store – grocery shopping for goodness sake – is so light when going alone. No fuss of diaper bag, food, changes, stroller, baby, and the whole trip around it. And when this happens I don’t know what to do with myself, I am so free. LOL
Oh, I’m pretty sure I could’ve written this exact same list. Sleeeeep…ohhmmmmm. And eating leisurely – how I miss that…now it’s the shovel, 2 chew and gulp. Very attractive. GREAT list that all Mom’s can relate to!
This post really touched me. I always feel strongly for friends who went away to boarding school for high school (and some, even for grade school) – there’s a poignancy about them (and in the men, a British distance about everything). Your post made me wonder why you went away to boarding school – as a parent I just can’t imagine not having my kids w. me as long as possible. But for lots of people boarding school is a really good thing too. And here I am dreading my children leaving my nest empty and the oldest is only 9. I have a few years but my how time flies.
I think it’s great you’ve been to yoga more than once! (-: That is more than me! And as for the guilt? Tell it to piss off. You have to be aggressive with mom-guilt, it’s everywhere and it’s insidious and never-ending. I’m pretty good now at massacring mom-guilt – I nip it in the bud almost as soon as it strikes! Good luck (-:
It’s amazing how deeply we can miss things like that. I used to hear parents talking about it before I had kids, and it’s not even necessarily each individual thing (though sometimes it is) but all together they sure change our lifestyles.
Tonya (using your name ;)), I miss a lot of these things for you too and you totally deserve to get them all back, here and there of course. After all the nannying I do and all the time I spend at your place, I certainly take advantage of all the sleeping in that I get and really make sure to enjoy all the peace and quiet that I get.
For the record, I missed you SOOOOOO much when we were living overseas! It took me a long time to understand why you didn’t live with us. I always wanted there to be a college where we lived. : )
And I do of course miss you too now. And your little piggy.
You’ve so got a list close to my heart! Well, except for the yoga part. Anywho, everything you said is so true for me. Especially the sleeping and having a long and leisurely dinner! Love this list.
I miss you too, sweet friend 🙁 I can’t believe that that picture of Lucas and I was taken over a year ago!!! I so wish I lived just down the road from you. Maybe one day!
This list is a perfect description of what we miss with motherhood!!! I mostly miss the guilt free time!
Je t’aime, Mon Amie de toujours XOXO
So here’s the bad news…my kids are grown and I still here “Mom” constantly, but I love it and I still say NO lol. My daughter lives one mile away and my son five miles and we are a very tight family. The good news – when they grow up they make dinner for you! (but of course a good mom still helps clean up – lol my daughter has a dry sense of humor, she doesn’t mean it but she says it for laughs) Hope you get some real sleep soon!
Oh sleep, right now I am missing sleep so much.
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