They say laughter is the best medicine and when it comes to raising kids, there has never been a truer statement. Take is from Tracy, also known as Sellabit Mum.
I had the pleasure of meeting Tracy at BlogHer last year and she is simply lovely. We have always had a fun banter and this letter to her eldest daughter is down right perfect and I am thrilled to welcome her here today.
Dear Eldest Daughter,
I’m glad we’ve reached the point in our relationship that you can laugh at me and not just laugh with me and get my jokes (although – thank goodness, as developing a good sense of humor is truly important), because I want you to know that I am human and that I hurt and also make many mistakes. Also, my jokes are always funny. Write that down.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s hard being the oldest child. Your parents obsessing about getting it all right. Buying the right crib, painting the nursery just so, finding the perfect potty chair, feeding you the right foods, reading you only the best books, taking you to all of the right classes, getting you professionally photographed every damn month. Not that I would admit to doing all of that but if I were to fess-up…pretty much we just wanted what was best..when honestly we had no idea what we were doing.
So then I wonder if it’s hard being the oldest child because you have little siblings watching your every move – the struggle for independence, the bedtimes pushed a little later, the trendy clothes, and the new fights with your parents.
At times it can be so overwhelming as a parent just knowing the immense responsibility we have raising kind, generous, contributing people that maybe we don’t stop the think that you carry some of that same weight. You get to experience our failures first-hand like a strange science experiment of the parenting kind.
I apologize. Also, no you can’t stay-up until 10pm this weekend. BECAUSE I SAID SO.
All of the above is just to really say that I’m scared. Very scared. You’re turning 10 this year. The next few years ahead of you will be filled with wonder, hormones, laughter, tears and probably pretty crazy fights with your mother. There will be days that you just want to play on the playground with your sisters and days where you feel like you don’t have a friend in the world.
But we will get though it and you need to know that the other side of it will be beautiful. Truly.
So for now – before this all starts and I stumble and fall and likely have to apologize 100 times for my unpreparedness…please remember that it all just boils down to these very simple things:
1. You are loved
2. You are beautiful
3. You are kind
4. You are important
5. You are smart
6. You are strong
but mainly…
7. You are too good for that boy, so get in the house NOW young lady and finish your homework.
See, it’s the laughter that is going to get us through. God willing.
Love you,
Mom
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Oh yes, I agree with this wholeheartedly. Laughter can help so much. All your girls are so blessed to have a mom that understands this.
Thank you! My laughter has been much needed these last few weeks. It’s truly a gift we all need to use. xoxo
You’re the best mom ever, Tracy. Your girls are so very lucky! Now, go write that book so I can buy it!
I don’t know about that…but you are the kindest person ever. xoxo Love you.
What a wonderful letter. Thank you for thinking out loud and sharing this. She may not appreciate it today, but when she has her own children she will understand it’s meaning.
I know. Have I apologized to you yet? lol
Thank you for having me here today. Waking up to see that my own mom commented pretty much just made my year. xoxo
What a wonderful letter! Every little girl needs to hear this from their mom.
Love this letter, Tracy. Can I save it for mine when she turns 10?
I get sad thinking about my kids growing up…sigh
I wonder if it’ll be harder with my girls then the boys, seems like there’s more to worry about…
and don’t tell her not to date that boy down the road…she’ll run off and marry him..remember to allow them to make their own mistakes…
Oh I know – LOVED doing the exact opposite of what my parents told me to do. 😉
Gorgeous my friend! She is so beautiful, and I love the part about getting through the hard part with the guarantee that the other side will be beautiful and worth it. Sometimes I wish someone would have stressed that to me more as a child.
Well and let me stay up until 10:00 🙂
This was wonderful! Funny & heartfelt. Loved it.
I could so write this to Eddie. I mean, he’s only two, but…yes.
My daughter will be 10 in 2 years. I’m not ready for that or for the thought of her hanging out with boys.
This growing up thing would have killed me if I didn’t laugh through some things.