Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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Plastic

Posted on November 9, 2011 Written by Tonya

I applied for and received my first credit card in 1994. I was 22 and a Junior in college. I was given a $400 credit limit to shop to my heart’s content at Victoria’s Secret [insert eye roll here] and I thought I was hot shit!

I didn’t know a thing about credit.

All I knew was I loved the idea of buying now and somehow paying later. I had a part-time job at Pier One Imports. I figured I would figure it out.

Of course, one credit card led to another and then another…

Once you were “in” with the Express/Limited family, all sorts of retailers welcomed you with credit lines. Department store credit cards soon followed and at one point, I had them all; Macy’s, Bloomingdale’s, Nordstrom’s, Neiman Marcus, etc. Many stores I didn’t even shop at.

Soon I had a wallet full of shiny plastic cards.

I am ashamed to admit that after opening one of the statements (also known as a BILL, I came to find out), my curious father paid off my plastic addiction. Well, first he had a fit and screamed and yelled and then he paid my off all of credit cards.

All the cards were promptly cut up in a ceremony sitting around our kitchen table. There was more yelling, many tears and relief.

None of the balances ever amounted to much, $80 here, $115 there, but my little part-time job wasn’t cutting it and it was time for me to face reality. In total, my parents paid off almost $1500. I was ashamed and vowed I would never let that happen again.

After that, I got smart (or so I thought) and used only one very special Visa card, which I proceeded to rack up a balance WAY more than $1500. I was not going to let my parents bail me out this time.

Although, they did but I don’t think they ever knew it.

When I graduated from college, my parents gave me enough money to live on for one year as a graduation gift. This included rent, utilities and car maintenance (gas and insurance). The check was written to me and I promptly turned around and paid Visa off in full! I was out of debt and also jobless.

Needless to say, I took the first $23,000/year position offered to me and never looked back.

I’ve always struggled with credit cards but I’ve never let myself get into debt again like those early years. I worked hard to stick to a budget and live with in my means but that always meant paycheck to paycheck for me.

Long story short, I’ve never been good with money, I suck at math and while I’m not a big shopper, I’m also not a big saver.

My husband and I sit down several times a year and review our spending, where we’re at financially and what our goals are. I am BEYOND grateful, completely relieved and much happier that he handles all of the bills and budget and anything and everything else pertaining to money in our home.

It’s just better this way.

This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop, Prompt 2.) One good reason why you are not in charge of your family’s finances.

Related Posts:

  • I Don’t Do Math
  • 10 Things My Parents Did Right
  • Small Treasures

Filed Under: college, confession, KRA, mama kat's writer's workshop, money, MSA, shopping, TDA bio Tagged With: college, confession, KRA, mama kat's writer's workshop, money, MSA, shopping, TDA bio

His & Hers

Posted on February 28, 2011 Written by Tonya

I gather the trash,
He takes it out.

He cooks,
I clean.

I plan date nights,
He books all our travel.

He watches our stocks, fights with our health insurance company and keeps us on budget.
I do the grocery shopping, pediatrician appointments and play dates.

I buy all the wedding, baby, birthday and Christmas presents,
He makes sure our cars are in working order, washed and full of gas.

I do the laundry,
He deals with the dry cleaning.

He records Top Gear,
I record Oprah.

He waters the lawn,
I buy fresh flowers.

I vacuum,
He dusts.

He handles all things electronic or that need assembly.
I buy Lucas’ clothing, books and toys.

He gets up with Lucas at the crack of dawn so that
I can sleep in.

He works six days a week so that
I can push Lucas on swings at the park, visit monkeys at the zoo, listen to story time at the library and ride on carousels.

I am lucky.
He is lucky.

We both raise our son.

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Filed Under: cooking, date night, family, life, marriage, money, oprah, outing, parenthood, parenting, praise

That’s Not Going To Pay For College

Posted on September 2, 2010 Written by Tonya

There is a bottle in our bedroom that we keep loose change in and have affectionately labeled “Lucas’ college fund”. We have cashed in the coins we have saved twice to the tune of almost $450 each time!

The bottle stands 24 inches tall and used to have a cork topper that went missing months ago. I wonder who hid it?

Lucas has grown fond of throwing things in the change bottle such as; a nail polish bottle, a tube of Neosporin, puffs, a bottle on conditioner and most recently my favorite chap stick.

It’s as though he is on a mission to find things to stash in the bottle and we catch him trying various shapes and sizes all the time.

I wish he knew how college tuition works.

I suppose it could be worse, he could be throwing things into the toilet!

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Filed Under: funny, money, photos, school

I Don’t Do Math

Posted on July 29, 2010 Written by Tonya

I know it embarrasses my husband when I pull out my tip calculator, but I suck at math!

In high school I excelled in English, history, art, music, PE and foreign language classes, but I was terrible at math and science.

In all honesty, if it weren’t for the homework and all the extra credit problems and reports I completed, I don’t think I would have even earned a diploma. I am not proud of this, I am just stating facts. I am proud to be very right brained.

Sitting in my seventh grade Algebra class, I would get dizzy staring at all the numbers on the chalkboard and when it came to formulas and word problems… forget it!

Tutors didn’t help. The summer courses I took didn’t help and neither did the knock down drag out fights I would have with my parents. They couldn’t understand why I was getting A’s and B’s in the courses I actually enjoyed and practically failing the ones I didn’t. It seemed pretty logical to me, but they were educators and thought my grades should be more “consistent”. I consistently argued that I’d never need math in my life.

By the time I got to college, I took the minimum required math courses that I needed in order to graduate and that was that. I’m ashamed to admit that I didn’t go for a marketing degree because I couldn’t handle all the math prerequisites and instead opted for a Bachelor of Arts in communications with an emphasis in public relations. I can still put together a marketing budget and successfully stick to it.

I like to think that I have a logical mind that is very black and white because I appreciate that in mathematics, there can only be one solution to a problem. I mean 2 + 2 can’t equal 5, right? But numbers have always boggled my mind. I just don’t have a head for them and I never have. I know just enough to get by and for everything else, there’s a calculator.

I understand the value of math and why it is important to learn basic formulas, fractions and percentages, but I’m already starting to worry about helping Lucas with his math homework. Beyond middle school, we are definitely going to have problems (no pun intended). Thank goodness his dad is a very proud left brainer and will assist in this arena.

Numbers or not, the best is yet to be.

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Filed Under: college, confession, money, school, TBW, TDA bio Tagged With: college, confession, money, school, TBW, TDA bio

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