Parents of an unruly two year old desperately seek playmate for their son.
Applicants must be easy going, polite, capable of patiently waiting for their turn, can take “no” for an answer and always pick up their toys when asked. Assistance and guidance will be provided as needed.
Interested parties are expected to challenge our son in such a way that he won’t know what hit him by forcing him to share his toys, books, dessert, crayons, photo ops, Christmas mornings, family vacations, doting parents and possibly clothes.
If applicant is male, he must be willing to share a room and wear hand-me-downs (see above), if applicant is female, she should be able to live with pink toile and either way, should be comfortable forever being known as “the baby”.
A cuddler is preferred but not mandatory.
As the “terrible twos” and maybe even threes (God, help us) subside, candidates should be able to look up to their big brother with admiration, respect, jealousy, animosity and love, all in equal measure. I assure you, he will do the same for you, as well as help guide and protect you. Our hope is that the two of you will become and remain the best of friends.
Although we are not picky, please note that we have been waiting a long time to find the perfect playmate for our son, but know the end of our search is drawing near and believe our home and hearts are open and ready for one more; one more little heart and soul to love and care for, one more set of hands to hold and life to share. We promise to love you as much as our first, but please hurry!
This post is was written for Write on Edge’s writing meme, Red Writing Hood. This week’s prompt: Write a 300 word (or less) personal ad. Constructive criticism is welcome.
