Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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To My Sister

Posted on October 11, 2011 Written by Tonya

If you don’t know who Jessica of My Time As Mom is, you must be living under a rock.

It truly is as simple as that.

First of all, she has a wonderful blog, is ALWAYS! on Twitter, is a Social Media Specialist for Eli Rose and co-founder of Vlog Talk, a weekly vlog meme. On top of all that, she is a killer Scrabble player ( speaking as the opponent who ass she kicks all the time) and is the kindest and most helpful person I probably have ever encountered.

I am so happy to have Jessica here today sharing a letter to her sister, Victoria.

To My Sister,

We have always been opposites.

From our hair to our shoes to our personalities.

The expressions salt and pepper and night and day have been used to describe us many times.

We have had our ups and downs in life.

We have laughed over stupid jokes and mom’s hair.

We have cried over the loss of family members and other things that I can’t remember.

We went many months without speaking to each other.

But we have always been sisters.

And we will always be sisters.

I know we don’t talk as often as we should and I don’t tell you I love enough.

But I do and my life wouldn’t be the same without you.

Although if I was you, I would recommend that you not listen to me the next time I tell you to shove a sock in your mouth. 

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Filed Under: family, guest post, Letters For You, siblings, twitter, vlog talk Tagged With: Eli Rose, family, guest post, Letters For You, My Time As Mom, siblings, twitter, Vlog Talk

Back To 1991

Posted on September 12, 2011 Written by Tonya

I was assigned my first e-mail address as a Freshman at the University of Arizona. It was 1991.

Professors were suppose to connect with their students regarding classes and assignments via electronic mail, but no one had a computer in those days. Students and faculty alike were meant to use the computer lab in a building several blocks from my dorm.

I can count on one hand how many times in my four years I attended college that I visited the computer lab.

All of my college papers were written on a Brother ML-500 Electronic Word Processing Typewriter. I thought I was so  state of the art with my dozens of floppy disks.

My first encounter with the Internet was also in college, circa 1995. My boyfriend at the time had a desk top computer (talk about state of the art), a giant piece of machinery that took up the entire surface of his kitchen table. He even had a printer. He used an online communications system called Prodigy.

He boasted how he could “look up” anything and information would be provided right there on the screen in front of us. Sure enough, as soon as I blurted out “Madonna”, he printed out a one page biography of the controversy-making pop queen. I was astounded.  

Fast forward to 2011 and you will find “248,000,000 results on ‘Madonna’ in 0.16 seconds.” on Google.

To say that times have changed is a gross understatement.

By 1996, I was on a computer every day at work, but had yet to experience the world wide web. I did have an AOL account and would go home on my lunch break to IM friends. It was amazing, just like having a phone conversation, but better and way more fun.

Five years later, my parents bought me my first lap top on which I spent hours on e-mail and on-line shopping. My favorite shopping cart at the time was at Amazon.com. Since 2001, I have made over 100 purchases on Amazon.com (of course they keep track).

Sharing this new technology with my father was for lack of a better word, sweet and amusing. He never quite accepted the concept that what you found on the Internet would remain there for you to recall another time and so he would print out everything. Having hard copies made him comfortable not to mention killed a lot of trees.

What I have found in my 15 years of Internet experience is that as long as you own a computer (or an iPhone) and have Internet access, virtually (pun intended) anything is possible. 

The Internet is the best and arguably the evilest invention ever. Everything is available right at our finger tips.

Today we get our world news, entertainment and weather on line. We Tweet, Pin and Stumble. We order groceries, diapers and the latest fashions, we research, find support, self-diagnose, fall in love, plan a wedding, prepare for a baby, book an exotic vacation and connect with our entire high school graduating class, even if we never said a word to them in person. We play Scrabble with our neighbors and laugh out loud to videos of giggling babies, we download, upload, bookmark, backup and can hide away from the world if we choose.

It’s sad when you stop and think about it. With the Internet, the need for real human interaction is almost unnecessary.

Knowing what I know now, I wonder if I could go back to 1991. Could you?

This post is for Write On Edge’s weekly writing assignment RemembRED. This week’s prompt: recall those early memories of being online.

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Filed Under: college, internet, iphone, MSA, remembeRED, TDA bio Tagged With: college, email, internet, MSA, remembeRED, TDA bio, twitter

Two Years Old

Posted on August 27, 2011 Written by Tonya

Letters For Lucas is two years old today!

I can’t believe I’ve been at this for two years.

There have been two redesigns, 682 posts, 12 guest posts, two blog conferences, many communities joined, countless photos shared, lots of self promoting tweets, tons of supportive retweets and some of the greatest friends made.

Over the past two years, I’m proud of how my voice has shone through in my writing and my writing has helped me explore my emotions regarding being a mother, sister, parentless parent and softie at heart.

I love my little space on the Internet. I love my readers and all the connections I have made through blogging, but the real reason I do this, aside from maintaining my sanity, is this precious little boy:

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Lucas is the inspiration for every single post I write and I hope someday he enjoys reading Letters For Lucas as much as I enjoy writing it. I hope my words give him greater insight to all of his mother’s complexities and offer us hours of conversation.Here’s to another two years and beyond!

A very special thank you to Morgan for these lovely photos of Lucas. She captured him to a tee; all of his sweet, mischievous, wonderful, curious, M&M and dirt loving magic. Thank you!

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Filed Under: blog, blogoversary, friends, happy thoughts, inspiration, internet, love, milestones, photos, twitter, wordful wendesdays, writing Tagged With: blog, blogoversary, friends, happy thoughts, internet, love, milestones, photos, twitter, wordful wednesdays, writing

How To Be The Best Blogger In The World

Posted on August 20, 2011 Written by Tonya

I’ve been blogging for almost two years and in that time I’ve learned a couple of things about how to be a good blogger.

There is a method to this madness, an unspoken etiquette that bloggers follow and some very important dos and don’ts.

For those of you feeling super ambitious, follow these tips and you may be crowned: The Best Blogger in the World! Please try to refrain from eye rolling until the end. 

1. Write an informative, insightful, witty, fantastic post every. single. day., complete with links to others and professional photographs to illustrate your points.

2. Publish your fantastic post at midnight on the dot, if you live on the east coast and 9:00 PM, if you live on the west coast.

3. Promote your fantastic post on Twitter (multiple times throughout the day), Facebook, (which includes your blog fan page, your personal Facebook page, the Studio+ 30 and 5 Minutes for Mom pages and any other Facebook pages that will allow you to, Stumble your fantastic post and add a teaser to BlogFrog (or other favorite community site) and join multiple memes/linkies and/or blog hops that apply, even if it’s stretch. It’s called multi-tasking, people. Oh, and driving traffic to your site.

4. Reply to each and every comment your fantastic post receives. Bonus points if you do this within minutes of receiving the comment. 

5. Follow every single person that follows you, whether it be on your blog or Twitter and engage. Hourly. Read their posts, comment on them and promote them.

Ugh.

Clearly, I’m kidding! There is NO WAY in hell anyone could do all this. Even with an extra 24 hours in their day. Though the “blogger guidelines” are unspoken, it sometimes feels like you have to be in people’s faces all the time just to keep up. It gets to be too much sometimes, doesn’t it? It does for me.

Truly, my only advice is this: write from the heart, be true to who you are and do your best to encourage, support and learn from others.

That’s it.  Simple, right?

Blogging shouldn’t feel like a chore. It shouldn’t cause you angst or pressure of any kind and the minute it’s not fun anymore, you should take a step back and reevaluate why you do it in the first place. Why do you blog? I hope it’s not to be the best blogger in the world.

By the way, I did post this on the Facebook pages mentioned above and will Tweet it in hopes of RTs all day. I will try my best to respond to all of you IF you comment, I’m sorry if I don’t already follow you and I would have included a photo but I couldn’t get my son to cooperate. No, he’s not relevant to the subject matter, but he sure is cute. 🙂

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Filed Under: advice, blog, facebook, internet, list, question, twitter, writing Tagged With: advice, blog, facebook, internet, list, question, twitter, writing

BlogHer ’11: My Recap

Posted on August 9, 2011 Written by Tonya

It wasn’t about the swag, the parties, the sessions, or even the networking.

Even though the swag was nice, the parties a lot of fun (especially Dance Party USA at Sparklecorn), the sessions I attended (Essential Writing and Editing Skills, Essential Blog Content Development Workshop, How to Pitch Freelance Editorial Work and Malcolm Gladwell is Missing the Point: Revolutions are Happening Online) extremely informative and the networking a great step towards furthering my freelance writing career, for me, BlogHer ’11 was more about finally meeting so many amazing women that I have been getting to know on the Internet through their blogs and on Twitter for months.

It was about the connections I have built online with women I had already considered friends, but wanted to hug in person and tell how much they mean to me. It was about surrounding myself with like-minded mothers, seeking their advice, sharing a laugh and a glass or two of wine and maybe even shedding a tear as they worked through an emotional moment. 

I did all of the above and in turn, BlogHer ’11 met and exceeded my expectations.

Thumbing through the stack of business/blog cards I collected from everyone I encountered makes me smile. Many of these women I already classified as members of my tribe and a few I had been fortunate enough to meet once or twice before, or talked to on the phone. Being able to spend an entire weekend with them was pure magic. There are also lots of new names in the stack and I’m looking forward to getting to know them and their writing soon.

I met most of the women on my “must meet at BlogHer ’11” list, but didn’t get to spend nearly as much time as I would have liked with anyone.  

The weekend moved much too fast and in a lot of ways felt like being back in school, shuffling from one event to the next, saving seats, checking in, wardrobe changes and cute shoes, gossip and laughs. It will surely be a weekend that I won’t soon forget and I’m already missing Natalie, Nichole, Katie, Sherri, Gigi, Morgan, Lori, Poppy, Robin, Yuliya, Galit, Cheryl, Tracy, Jessica … this list could go on and on and on.

All I can say is, thank God for Twitter!

Feeling more inspired and focused about my writing and my little corner of the Internet than ever, I am planning to attend BlogHer ’12 in New York!

I took copious notes during the sessions I sat in and will be sharing a few tips over the coming weeks (although I believe the bulk of the information covered will be available on the BlogHer Web site), but if you’d like to know more about my BlogHer experience or have a specific question, please ask.

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Filed Under: blog conference, friends, inspiration, twitter Tagged With: blog conference, friends, inspiration, twitter

Pinterest

Posted on May 13, 2011 Written by Tonya

First it was MySpace, then Facebook, followed by Twitter and now, my new latest obsession is ~ drum roll, please…. Pinterest.

What is Pinterest you ask?

Think of Pinterest as a virtual pinboard — a place where you can create collections of things you love and “follow” collections created by people with great taste.

People use Pinterest to collect and share all sorts of things — wedding inspiration, favorite T-shirts, DJ equipment. You name it, people are pinning it.

We know you have great taste in something. Our mission is to make Pinterest the best place for you to share your taste with the world.

Over the last week I have spent HOURS on this site pinning favorites faces, places, products, pretty things, quotes, gift ideas, and items on my lust after list.


Things like:

Anything goes and the best part is that every image links back to original source/site for more information.

What an awesome idea and a HUGE wonderful waste of time. If you pin, come find me!

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Filed Under: facebook, inspiration, internet, me time, pinterest, twitter Tagged With: facebook, inspiration, interest, me time, pinterest, twitter

What I Love About Being A Mom

Posted on April 27, 2011 Written by Tonya

The top five things I love about being a mom:

1. My kisses make boo boos all better.

2. I get to play, act really silly, sing and dance, color with crayons, blow bubbles, use sidewalk chalk and squish Play-Doh between my fingers.

3. I love hearing “mommy”, even if it’s three o’clock in the morning.

4. I have to listen to my instincts, go with my gut and trust that the decisions I am making are the “right” ones for my son.

5. There’s a little person running around growing, learning, thriving, smiling and being super cute all because of me and my husband.

What do you love about being a mom? 

I threw this question out on Twitter the other night and here are some of the touching and humorous responses I got (names have been withheld to protect the innocent, sentimental and exhausted), in the order in which they were received:

  •  Bedtime 😉
  • Earlier today my kiddos and I were hanging out on my bed goofing around. I like those moments best.
  • I love feeling needed. And I love how proud I am of my son. Every day.
  • Not a mom but I crave the chance to relive the wonder of life thru the eyes of an innocent child. To see reactions at tastes and the feeling of sand on their toes the first time they realize it feels different. Reactions to music.
  • I love that they are mine.
  • The unconditional love you get in return. Kisses & hugs & laughs & funny conversations. & the pride when they succeed/excel.
  • What do I love about being a mom? Right now I really love bedtime.
  • Little stuff: my kiddo holding my hand, knowing how to make him laugh, comfort him. Big stuff: watching a person I created learn and explore. Passing on my values. Seeing a person emerge.
  • I love being there for everything, from small scrapes to huge milestones. I love every second of their lives.
  • I love morning bed snuggles and kisses from my 4 yr old who says *I Love You Mama!!*
  • I love that I get to nurture and take care of my little ones’ needs.
  • I love being called “mama”.
  • I love the snuggles. little I love you’s at random times of the day. The idea of a piece of me in them. Seeing myself in them.
  • I love pressing my cheek against their little cheeks.
  • Coming home from even just the grocery store, and opening the door to huge eyes full of excitement while they are all jumping up and down chanting “mama! mama!”…and Tater says “I missed you so much mom!”

 

This post was featured on Natalie’s blog, Mommy of a Monster, in her weekly feature, Monster Likes #16 on April 30, 2011.

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Filed Under: feature, list, love, mommy (of a monster) likes, motherhood, question, twitter Tagged With: feature, list, love, mommy (of a monster) likes, motherhood, question, twitter

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