Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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Old School Blogging: Full-On Random

Posted on March 13, 2015 Written by Tonya

I’m linking up with Elaine of The Miss Elaine-ous Life and Julia from Wine in Mom for a little Old School Blogging and today and it is going to get random!

1. If you could be on a reality show which one would you choose?
None! I’m not a fan of reality TV. I think most of it scripted so there’s nothing really “real” about it and it completely salacious and I feel so embarrassed for whomever is  being featured. If I had to choose though it’d be Chopped. I’d be the first one kicked off, but I would have a hell of a time with that first basket of mystery items!

2. Name one thing you have saved from your childhood?
I’m a sentimental fool and I’ve saved tons of stuff from my childhood; concert ticket stubs, playbill, favorite dolls, Barbies, and my Raggedy Ann & Andy blankie.

3. If your life had a theme song what would it be?
That’s a hard one, I associate with so many different songs for all the different chapters of my life. I wrote a post called The Soundtrack Of My Life back in 2010 and revisiting it, the only song I’d add is A Thousand Years by Christina Perri because it wouldn’t be my life without it. Incidentally, for the back story on that, I wrote Live & In Person.

4. Where is your happy place?
I’m a homebody by nature, but I gain such peace and clarity by being at the beach.

beachlove

5. What is one thing about your home that you and your spouse disagree on?
Our dog. Hands-down the worst mistake I’ve ever made in my life was getting a dog and my husband and I argue about him, his care, his behavior, his hair, and his actions all the time!! We don’t argue about anything else.

6. What is your favorite fruit?
Granny Smith apples.

7. Bowtie or regular tie?
I used to work for a complete dick tyrant who wore a bowtie so I’m going with regular.

8. Mexican or Italian (food, not men)?
Hardest question ever. Seriously, how is one to choose? Too much good stuff… Penne all’Arrabbiata, bruschetta, cannoli, chianti, salsa, enchiladas, tequila. Moving on.

9. Where do you want to go on summer vacation?
Anywhere in Europe, but my desire to return to Paris is growing greater by the day! It’s my husband and my favorite city in the world and we are anxious to take our children, but we want them to love it as much as we do so the timing has to be just right!

10. What are your go-to shoes in your closet?
After almost 20 years in SoCal, that’s easy, flip-flops!

Related Posts:

  • Old School Blogging: I Am
  • Old School Blogging: Reflections
  • Old School Blogging: The ABC’s Of Me

Filed Under: beach, blog hop, list, marriage, music, old school blogging, puppy, question, random, travel Tagged With: beach, blog hop, list, marriage, music, old school blogging, puppy, question, random, The Miss Elaine-ous Life, travel

Best Dave Matthews Band Lyrics

Posted on September 19, 2014 Written by Tonya

If you know anything about me, have been reading Letters For Lucas for a while, or have bothered to read any of my social media bios; you know the ones that offer limited characters, then you would know I LOVE the Dave Matthews Band! I’m obsessed.

Have been since college.

Can listen to their songs on repeat and never grow tired of them.

I drag my husband to see them in concert at least once a year. Funny story… just three days before this year’s concert, Saturday, September 6 we misplaced our tickets! My husband swore he brought them home from work, where he had them mailed and I swore he didn’t. I know, I know, who gets paper tickets anymore? Super fans, that’s who! We ended up finding them (in an unlikely drawer at Todd’s office) and had a blast at the show, but our house was definitely a little tense for a couple of days.

I digress.

I suppose it could be said if you aren’t a Dave Matthews lover then this post is probably not for you, however, if you are a lover of the English language and enjoy words and the way they roll off the tongue and sound when grouped with other words, then please keep reading….

In my ever humble opinion, in no particular order, here are 11 of the BEST Dave Matthews Band lyrics:

bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics bestDMBlyrics

Related Posts:

  • Live & In Person
  • Pure Bliss
  • Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition

Filed Under: DMB, lyrics, music Tagged With: DMB, lyrics, music

Live & In Person

Posted on April 3, 2014 Written by Tonya

Several times I have shared how much I love music, from my current workout playlist, to favorite songs and my adoration of Dave Matthews.

I have a short list of songs that I *must* hear performed live before I die because they are some of my all time favorites, meaningful to me and have helped me find my voice when my own words have failed me or I simply admire the artist so much that I have to see them in concert. In alphabetical order, they are:

  • #41 by The Dave Matthews Band*
  • A Thousand Years by Christina Perri*
  • Anna Begins by The Counting Crows*
  • Clarity by John Mayer*
  • Good Enough by Sarah McLachlan
  • Nick of Time by Bonnie Raitt*
  • Piano Man by Billy Joel*
  • Pictures of You by The Cure
  • Second Hand News by Fleetwood Mac*
  • Someone Like You by Van Morrison

I’ve been lucky enough to see the starred ones, some more than once!

Last night I saw Christina Perri at a small radio marketing event that my sister’s company was involved in at the Hard Rock Cafe in Hollywood. Perri sang only three songs, two from her new album, released this week and opened with “A Thousand Years”.

I cried through the entire song. I didn’t sing along even though I know every word, I just cried.

I loved the Twilight series, read the books and was first in line to see the movies (all five), but I don’t remember hearing Perri’s song during the credits of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn—Part 1. Apparently after fans heard it on the movie’s soundtrack, they adopted it as “Bella and Edward’s song”. It’s significance to me isn’t Twihard related; for me it served as an anthem during my struggles with infertility, a love song to a child I longed to meet someday.

I’m still recovering/processing/coming up for air from that chapter of my life and it’s proving to be harder than I thought. Infertility is a crazy roller coaster ride of ebbs and flows, hope and disappointment and there were some very dark days when I didn’t think I could handle it anymore and those were the days I turned to my infertility playlist for inspiration, a good cry and above all comfort. “A Thousand Years” is on that playlist and will always be a favorite and gentle reminder of a very difficult period of my life.

Last night was only the second time I have heard the song since my miracle, Lola was born and I was completely overcome with emotion. It’s a beautiful and moving song.

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

Not only did I get the chance to hear Christina Perri live, I also met her after her set and told her how much her song means to me. She was gracious and kind and asked how everything turned out and thanked me for sharing my story.

It was a very special experience. Thank you, again, Leah! You better believe I rushed home to snuggle our little Lola.

PicMonkey Collage1

Meeting Christina Perri – Hard Rock Cafe, April 2, 2014

Related Posts:

  • Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition
  • We Remembered
  • Pure Bliss

Filed Under: aunt leah, DMB, infertility, lyrics, movies, music Tagged With: aunt leah, Christina Perri, DMB, infertility, lyrics, movies, music

Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition

Posted on December 18, 2013 Written by Tonya

Today I am linking up with Elaine of The Miss Elaine-ous Life and Kir of The Kir Corner for this month’s Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition! If you’re not familiar with Old School Blogging, it’s where bloggers revive blogging memes that went around years ago.

 

Do you Celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, or both?

santa

Ho Ho Ho!! Does this answer the question? (:

Peppermint or Chocolate?

Chocolate. Always chocolate. 

Sing us into the Holiday Season. What is your favorite carol this time of year?

I have a play list of over nine hours of holiday music! For me it’s not Christmastime until I hear Wham’s Last Christmas or Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime, but I adore the lyrics to Grown Up Christmas List:

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend,
Right would always win,
Love would never end.
This is my grown up Christmas list

– David Foster (music), Linda Thompson-Jenner and Amy Grant (lyrics)

Tell us about a favorite family or personal holiday tradition.

One of my favorite family holiday traditions on Christmas Day was after all the presents were opened and prominently displayed in front of the tree (another tradition), we would go to a movie. Many big blockbusters open on Christmas Day and we always had fun trying to agree on which one to see. After the movie we would come home and make leftover turkey sandwiches and each have a slice (or two) of pie. Chocolate pudding for me, pumpkin for my dad, and pecan for my mom and sister. It’s hard to believe that this will be my sixth Christmas without my parents, but my sister and I have kept up this tradition.

Come on, you remember your favorite Christmas gift.  Tell us all about it.

In November 2007, a month after my parents died, my husband, sister and I traveled to Tunisia to visit the school, ACST (American Cooperative School of Tunis), where they worked. We wanted to spend time where they last had, visit with their colleagues and gain some peace and understanding. It was also important to me to be the ones that cleared out their home.

It was a difficult trip to say the least, but necessary for our grieving process. We were met with much understanding and support and much of the time we were not only being consoled but were consoling.

In a very touching ceremony, the school planted two olive trees in a common area on campus and dedicated one to each of my parents while we were in town.

That year for Christmas my husband had an olive tree planted for me in our side yard.

I love this tree and will always appreciate the kind gesture that my husband made in finding and having it planted at our home. It will forever remind me of our trip to Tunis, the two trees that grow and bloom there in memory of my parents and of course, my parents themselves.

This poor tree has been uprooted and been living in a box for almost two years. This week it was planted in the front yard at our new house where it will hopefully grow and flourish.

tree

December 16, 2013

That magical moment: your favorite scene from a holiday movie.

It’s A Wonderful Life is my favorite holiday movie and I love when Clarence tells George: “You see George, you really had a wonderful life.” Ah… gets me every time.

Kissing under the mistletoe. Who do you hope is standing underneath (we know it’s normally your spouse, but if it did not have to be, who would you choose)?

Ryan Gosling.

Duh.

Swans a swimming, lords a leaping, golden rings: which gift of the 12 days of Christmas would you like most?

None! Unless those maids do more than milking.

Play Secret Santa. What inappropriate gift would you love to give this year?

Hmmm… I’m going to have to give this some thought but Ryan Gosling and a big red bow come to mind. Just off the top pf my head.

Martha Stewart or the Grinch? What is your decorating style?

I wish I could say Martha Stewart, but I really fall somewhere in between. Someday I want to splurge and have lights professionally installed on the front of our house. I looked into it this year, but was shocked at how utterly ridiculously expensive it is. I like to get our tree up early and I have a motley crew of Christmas guys (stuffed animals) displayed around the house and holiday towels for the guest bathroom. I am grateful that we haven’t started the Elf on the Shelf madness yet!

What is ONE WORD that defines the holiday season for you?

Believe! 

If Santa could assure its delivery, what’s the first thing on your holiday wish LIST?

The safe delivery of a healthy baby girl, born anytime after January 1, 2014! 

If you want to play along or read other Old School Blogging: Holiday Edition lists, visit The Miss Elaine-ous Life or The Kir Corner and then compile your own! Don’t forget to tweet it out using the hashtag #OSBlog. Happy Christmas, everyone!

 

Related Posts:

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  • Old School Blogging: Full-On Random
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Filed Under: blog hop, family, gifts, holidays, movies, music, old school blogging Tagged With: blog hop, family, gifts, holidays, lyrics, movies, music, old school blogging

Something You Learn

Posted on February 19, 2013 Written by Tonya

Lizz of Am I a Funny Girl? is my guest today and she is a very proud mama to her son, Max.

Her letter to Max makes my heart swell and serves as a beautiful reminder that our children are precious gifts and we should feel so blessed to have them and be the ones that get to raise them.

Thank you, Lizz for choosing my space to share your loving words.

Letters For You

Dear Max,

I love you the most, you know that right?

You make me so proud to be your mommy, so often, I could just explode.

You are funny and smart and I know that you’ll be an amazing catch for someone someday. My goal as your mom is to make you into the very best man you can possibly be. A man like your Daddy, who is loving and handy. A man like Grandpa who is practically a super genius, but has never lost touch with his creative side, with his painter-photographer self. A man like Papa, who is always on the lookout for a cool new hobby, and isn’t afraid to take risks in order to get the really great rewards.

Your Great-Grampy was an awesome guy, too, and so much like Daddy. Besides having his name as your middle, he was handy and loved baseball and he was Nana’s own Daddy and he would have loved you so, so much. I’m sad you never got to meet him, but I’m sure he’s keeping an eye on you every day from Heaven.

You’re turning 5 soon, and getting so big! Comparing you now to when you were born is an overwhelming task; comparing that teeny tiny boy in the isolette to the rambunctious kid dancing in my living room makes my heart swell.

You’ve learned so much: Counting and reading, talking and singing. How to tell a knock knock joke, how to use a toot to the maximum comedic effect. How to use a fork, how to build the best train tracks ever. You know how to play Angry Birds and climb to the top of the slide by yourself. You can identify every animal in the zoo and remember things that I have long since forgotten. (Really? You had a giraffe on your cupcake at your 3rd birthday party? I’ll have to take your word on it)

As much as you’ve already learned, there is so much more to teach you! Some things are important, and some of them aren’t, but in my goal of making you the very best man you can be, they all add up. How to do laundry, how to write a love letter to win her heart, how to wear the correct amount of cologne (it’s less than you think!), how to tie a tie. Properly flipping a fried egg, how to pitch a tent, making the perfect cup of coffee.

Your Daddy and I love teaching you these things, and you love learning them. We go out of our way to show you how to do stuff; the proper way to put away the silverware (Awww, your first chore!) and how to sound out a difficult word in a story.

I try so hard to set a good example. Can I tell you a secret? I don’t really like some of the food we eat either, but I try it anyway, because you never know! I know you don’t like a lot of stuff; bell peppers, avocados, mustard and minty things come to mind. But you have to keep trying! Did you know I used to not like salami? Crazy, right? You just have to try things. I hope you see my willingness to try and keep that in your heart.

But what about the stuff we aren’t teaching on purpose? Kiddo, that’s the stuff that I worry about the most. Do you see how much Daddy and I love each other? There’s no such thing as too many hugs or kisses. How I always love Auntie Katie, even when she drives me bonkers? I call and talk to Nana every day, even if just to say hi and talk about what we’re having for dinner. We’re family, and it’s what we do! Daddy takes great care of me when I’m sick… are you noticing that? We love to laugh together, and I hope it’s something you keep with you.

This learning doesn’t end, sweet boy. Every day is a chance to learn something new.

Today, I learned that I actually do like ‘Beef Pad See You’ for lunch, because I took a chance and tried it!

Every day is an opportunity to learn, if you go out and grab it!

I love you to the moon and back,
Mommy

Max then and now

Max was born 12 weeks early due to sudden and severe pre-eclampsia. Click photo to read his birth story.

Follow Lizz on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

The song Something You Learn by Lori Henriques inspired this post, if you care to take a listen:

Send Newsletters to your fans from ReverbNation.com

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Filed Under: guest post, Letters For You, music Tagged With: Am I a Funny Girl?, guest post, Letters For You, music

Playlist

Posted on December 13, 2012 Written by Tonya

Music helps me.

For as long as I can remember I have sang along to my favorite songs and other tunes that I just couldn’t escape. For every major milestone in my life, I can associate a song. Certain lyrics speak to me and make me feel better; or worse depending on my mood. But they always assure me I am in good company; that someone in the world has felt exactly what I am.

I’ve shared some of my favorite workout tunes before and that playlist is ever growing and changing. I need songs to lift me up and give me that extra ump to sweat a little longer, run a little faster and challenge myself.

I’ve had a little bit too much
All of the people start to rush.
Start to rush babe.
A dizzy twister dance
Can’t find my drink or man.
Where are my keys, I lost my phone.

Just Dance – Lady Gaga

While planning my wedding I put together a playlist of timeless love songs and listened to it as I got ready, walked down the stairs of our house, out into our backyard and met my groom. From there on, a solo guitarist took over, but whenever I play that playlist, I am right back there taking my father arm and descending the staircase.

You know me better than that
Think I’d leave you down
When you’re down on your knees?
I wouldn’t do that


By Your Side – Sade

When my parents died, I created a playlist of songs that would guarantee to make me cry. Like big ugly, crocodile tears cry because sometimes I’d walk around for days with a lump in my throat and finally just had to let it out. I’d give in, press play on a playlist I called “Amazing Grace” because that was one of my mother’s favorite songs and let the tears flow. It is a healing mix of deeply personal songs and family favorites and I always felt a little better afterward hearing it. A good cry often has that effect.

But all that I know is I’m breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

Keep Breathing – Ingrid Michaelson

Before Lucas was born I put together a collection of songs aptly titled, “Birth Day” that I had hoped to listen to while in labor. Things moved too fast for me to even grab my iPod the night he was born, but I listened to that compilation over and over and over in the weeks and days leading up to his arrival. The songs were dreams I had for my son, uplifting and hopeful.

My wish for you
Is that this life becomes all that you want it to
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small
You never need to carry more than you can hold

My Wish – Rascal Flatts

This year I made a new playlist full of songs of empowerment, triumph,  strength and promise. Each one screams: don’t give up! They have become my anthems.

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

A Thousand Years – Christina Perri

I am pretty sure the artists included on this list weren’t singing about infertility, but they work.

For me.

What are your go-to songs when you need a good cry, a swift kick in the pants or gobs of inspiration?

 

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Filed Under: challenges, exercise, list, love, lyrics, music, pregnancy, question Tagged With: challenges, exercise, list, love, lyrics, music, pregnancy, question, secondary infertility

Happy Sighs

Posted on September 10, 2012 Written by Tonya

Apart from spending time with my husband, son, puppy and friends, and maybe reading and working out, the thing that makes me the happiest is listening to Dave Matthews Band.

In fact, there was an amazing moment on my recent trip to Mexico when “#41”, my favorite DMB song came on while a small group of my friends and I were sailing on the Gulf of California and I couldn’t help but dance all over the boat feeling free and light and relaxed and oh so very happy. It was one of those moments that deep sighs are made of and will make me smile for a long time whenever I think of it.

If you know me or have been reading Letters For Lucas for any length of time then you know I am a die-hard DMB fan and never miss a concert when they come through my town.

I am thrilled to be guest posting on The Trend Tribe today with my first ever concert review of Saturday’s Irvine Dave Matthews Band show.

If you have never heard of The Trend Tribe, it is a super cool Web site featuring the latest trends in fashion, travel, events, food and health and it meant a lot to me that Editor-in-Chief, Nicole Standley came to me with this assignment.

Please visit me here today!

I HEART DMB!

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Filed Under: DMB, music, my guest posts, pastime, simple joys, The Trend Tribe Tagged With: DMB, music, my guest posts, pastime, simple joys, The Trend Tribe

Remembering Whitney

Posted on February 12, 2012 Written by Tonya

Like the rest of the world, I was completely shocked hearing the news of Whitney Houston’s death on Saturday. What a tragic loss.

As a teenager, I spent countless hours singing into my hairbrush in front of the mirror and coming up with dance moves to all kinds of popular music, but I distinctly remember trying to hit and hold the long notes just like Whitney in her mega hits, “Saving All My Love for You”, “So Emotional” and the incomparable “I Will Always Love You”. It was never going to happen, but was very fun trying and her songs will forever be a part of the fabric of my youth. 

Whitney’s voice is golden and no matter what personal demons she may have faced, she paved the way for so many young stars today and there is no doubt her talent will be missed.

Yesterday, while visiting my sister we had an impromptu Whitney session and even Lucas got in the groove. 

RIP Whitney.

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Filed Under: aunt leah, current events, music, TDA bio, video Tagged With: aunt leah, current events, music, TDA bio, video

Channeling My Inner Teeny Bopper

Posted on January 22, 2012 Written by Tonya

I adore music and do just about everything better with it playing in the background.

My musical taste is very eclectic (read an old post I wrote called My ipod Has Schizophrenia to get a better understanding).

Lately, I have been channeling my inner teeny bopper with some super fun, upbeat tunes that I just had to share.

Some of you may be completely OVER these songs because they do get a lot of radio play, but I love them and as long as they keep putting a smile on my face and spring in my step, I’ll keep listening to them. Plus they make me feel young(er).

Incidentally, all of these put together make for a great workout playlist!

In no particular order, my Top 10 favorite songs this month:

1. What The Hell? – Avril Lavigne

Favorite line: All my life I’ve been good but now I’m thinking what the hell

2. Tonight Tonight & I Like It Like That (featuring New Boyz) – Hot Chelle Rae

Favorite line: I don’t know if I’ll make it but watch how good I’ll fake it

3. Who Says? – Selena Gomez & The Scene 

Favorite lines: Who says you’re not star potential?
Who says you’re not presidential?

4. Good Life – OneRepublic

Favorite lines: Hopelessly I’m taking a mental picture of you now
‘Cause hopelessly the hope is we have so much to feel good about 

5. Pumped Up Kicks – Foster the People

It’s all about the whistling!

6. Mr. Know It All & What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger) – Kelly Clarkson

Favorite line: ‘Cause baby, you don’t know a thing about me

7. The Show Goes On – Lupe Fiasco

Favorite lines: Anybody ever wonder, when they would see the sun up
Just remember when you come up
The show goes on!

8. The Edge of Glory – Lady Gaga

This song will forever remind me of BlogHer ’11 and how I SHOULD HAVE participated in that awesome Flash Mob!

9. We Are Young (featuring Janelle Monae) – Fun.

Favorite lines: We are young
So let’s set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

10. Faster – Matt Nathanson

Favorite lines: You taste like sunlight and strawberry bubble gum
You bite my lip, you spike my blood
You make my heart beat faster

I’ve been known to make (and mail) CDs before, so if you are interested (and I can remember how to do it), let me know! 

This post was inspired by Stasha’s Monday Listicles, a linky right up my alley, because I LOVE lists!

Related Posts:

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  • Old School Blogging: The Holiday Edition

Filed Under: exercise, lyrics, monday listicles, music Tagged With: exercise, lyrics, monday listicles, music

Michael Bublé Christmas CD Winners!

Posted on November 28, 2011 Written by Tonya

We must be one of the few homes that did not get decked out this weekend for the holidays, but when we do, you better believe our soundtrack will be this…. 

The winners of the Michael Bublé Christmas CDs are: Mel (comment #3) and Jessica (comment #13)!

Congratulations, ladies! Enjoy and have a very happy holiday.

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Filed Under: giveaway, holidays, music, update Tagged With: Four Plus an Angel, giveaway, holidays, music, update

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