Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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#ApartmentLiving

Posted on June 21, 2013 Written by Tonya

Remember a few weeks ago when I was bitching up a storm and said that I could provide an entire blog post about all the things I dislike about apartment living? Without further adieu….

The Top 10 Things I Dislike About #ApartmentLiving:

10. I’m 10 years too old for this shit! I’ve lived in my fair share of apartments (six to date beginning at age 20 in college) and it gets old real fast. There’s no privacy, lots of noise and very little space. I know it’s only temporary, but I’ve done my time in apartments and I’m over it!

9. We’re on the third floor with NO elevator (a fact that we did not learn until the day before we moved in)! Think groceries, sleeping child in the car and the transfer, etc.

8. No (personal) yard.

7. Limited storage space, resulting in not one but three separate storage units (don’t ask) including our one car garage.

6. No room for overnight guests (wait, is that really a bad thing?).

5. Our dishwasher is as big as a small Igloo ice chest, as in the size you bring to work for lunch so it gets run at least three times a week.

4. It is nearly impossible to find a parking spot after 9:30 at night. More than once I have had to park at least a 1/2 mile away from my front door.

3. We have a dog who refuses to use his porch potty (see #9).

2. We are constantly on Lucas’ case about his noise level and romping around, which is so unfair to him. He’s four and a boy and loud!

1. I mentioned the noise level, but the fights we overhear, yelling at the TV during major sporting events and pretty much constant barking dogs can really make one go crazy.

I digress… It’s not all bad! I can’t believe it’s already been three months. We have  awesome swimming pools, a state of the art gym, free weekly yoga class, maintenance staff that responds quickly and we’re all together. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter where we live as long as we have that.

But, I’m still counting down. I have a countdown calendar running on my phone and as of this very minute, we only have 132 days left.

Provided we can find a house!!

photo

 

 

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Filed Under: annoyances, family, home, list, move, puppy Tagged With: annoyances, apartment living, family, home, list, move, puppy

Keep, Donate, Sell, Or Trash

Posted on June 6, 2013 Written by Tonya

It’s hard to clear the life out of a house.

It goes into Hefty bags and worn out boxes.

Possessions and treasured keepsakes alike become things, just stuff. Or, so you tell yourself.

You will detach and then instantly reattach, second guessing what to do with each and every article.

Personal documents are shredded.

Each piece of clothing is removed from its hanger and you will bury your face in collars and breathe in, just in case a scent still lingers.

Taking a bitter sweet trip down memory lane, photos are studied and divided.

Books containing underlined sentences are set aside with an overwhelming desire to go back read later.

Some things are donated to Salvation Army or Goodwill in hopes that they will find a new home, others are gifted to family and friends with love.

Many items are carefully wrapped in tissue paper and bubble wrap, saved for reasons yet unknown.

Countless trips and decisions will be made.

A storage unit will quickly be filled.

An estate sale will be held.

This house will no longer feel like a home. 

Improvements will begin, slowly at first and then with shear determination… new tile, carpet, paint, appliances.

Before you know it, five years will go by. 

There will be major set backs, a lot of tears and frustration.

There will also be acceptance and peace.

A realtor will eventually be contacted and a “For Sale” sign posted.

An offer will be accepted.

After piles of paperwork, several e-mails and much negotiation, escrow will close.

If you think it’s hard to clear the life out of a house, try two lives.

21309535

This house was once a home. December 1990 – June 2012.

 

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Filed Under: home, KRA, loss, MSA, stuff Tagged With: home, KRA, loss, MSA, stuff

Home

Posted on April 11, 2013 Written by Tonya

home

home sweet home

home is where the heart is

home on the range

home run

I’ve been thinking about home a lot lately… what makes a home, how home feels, how nothing else matters in the world than being at home, surrounded by the people and the things you treasure most.

Memories are made at home.

Family and friends gather at home.

Home grounds us, it’s our constant, our safe haven, our soft place to land. 

Home isn’t a place, it’s a feeling and embodies comfort at it’s finest, whether it’s a lavish estate or a shoebox apartment, home is everything.

We have been in our new home a month and I’m making the best of it while marking off the days until we move again. I’ve realized that it doesn’t matter where we live, as long as we are together.

Quiet cul-de-sac, updated foothills home has expansive, panoramic views of the Tucson Country Club golf course, soaring ceilings, fireplace in the family room. French doors off  breakfast room lead to privately landscaped patio/terrace. Stainless steel appliances convey. Tons of storage in extended garage.

My parents house went live on MLS (Multiple Listing Service) less than an hour ago.

There is a For Sale sign in the front yard and I am equal parts thrilled and crestfallen.

Their house that hasn’t been a home for 5-1/2 years but it is finally ready to be occupied by a new family.

It has been a hell of a journey to get to this point, but it’s time for new memories and the chance to be a home again.

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Filed Under: home Tagged With: home

No Dogs Allowed?

Posted on February 4, 2013 Written by Tonya

Recently our landlady found out we have a puppy. We’re guessing it was the photo on our holiday card. See below. 

According to our Renters Agreement, no pets are allowed. I thought my husband had cleared Charlie Pasta’s arrival with her over the summer, but apparently he did not. After berating him (my husband, not the dog) over the phone, she insisted on visiting  to inspect the current condition.

We keep a neat house, despite having a toddler and a puppy. A very neat house. I’m a very anal retentive, OCD, type A, controlling organized person and everything in my home has a place, there is very little clutter, beds are made each morning and toys are picked up throughout the day. We have our house professionally cleaned once or twice a month, the dog is crate-trained and rarely unsupervised. He also goes to the groomer once or twice a month, in addition to being bathed at home once a week.

Even with all of the tidiness, getting ready for this woman’s visit was like a Seinfeld episode…

The day before, Todd and I were leaving town for a quick trip to Tucson to check on the work being done at the house my sister and I inheritance from our parents. I was trying to organize the details of Lucas’ care while we would be away. We don’t want either of our two trusted babysitters to be responsible for the dog too, so we decide to board him and at the same time have him neutered. 🙁

Luckily, the day before the visit was also housekeeper day, but while vacuuming, one of them pulled a snag in the carpet in our bedroom that lead to an eight inch long gaping hole.

A frantic phone call to a carpet repair specialist and $75 later the problem was solved. If you’ve ever wondered how holes in carpets are repaired, it’s much like a facelift with stretching and tugging and lots of glue! It’s a fascinating process.

What I kept thinking as we bid our son farewell for 24 hours and headed to the airport was what must a complete stranger think about us upon entering our home. What does our space reveal about us?

Our style is eclectic, mismatched pillows on the couch in our living room, dozens of books on the shelves and magazines on the bedside tables, family and car photos adorn the walls, except in Lucas’ room, which has Dr. Seuss prints and a huge Lucas Oil sign. You’ll find a treadmill and a spin bike in one room and a welcoming guest bed in the another. There are doormats at every door that leads outside. There’s a bowl of fruit on the kitchen counter next to a gourmet style coffee maker. There are several bottles of perfume on the sink in the master bathroom and tons of evidence that not only a child, but also a canine live here too.

What you can’t see when you walk through our house is that we are a family, we are responsible people, parents and pet owners and we respect where we live. Not just on drop by visit days, every day.

010 - Version 2

Although we haven’t heard from her, our landlady came and went and took our February rent check with her, so I guess we are allowed to stay. For now.

EDITED TO ADD: I guess it all comes down to the Renter’s Agreement. Today we received notice that we have 45 days to vacate. Oh joy!

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Filed Under: annoyances, family, home, move, puppy Tagged With: annoyances, family, home, landlandy, move, puppy

Uno Mas Cerveza, Por Favor

Posted on September 4, 2012 Written by Tonya

While everyone is giving three cheers for surviving their child’s first day of school today, I’m cracking open a cold one, sighing heavily and praising God that I survived my first day back from vacation.

Today started way too early and made me wish I had slept more while I was in Cabo San Lucas over the long weekend.

It was the longest I had ever been away from Lucas without hearing his voice or seeing his sweet face… four days and three nights and it was agony, even though I did have a lot of fun and was able to relax like I haven’t been able to in a long time and I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with my girlfriends and laughing like I was 15 again.

Almost as soon as it began, it was over.

I thought of this view at least a dozen times today.

The dog was up three times last night; 2:00 AM, 2:30 AM and then again for good at 6:00. Lucas, on the other hand, slept in until after 7:00. Go figure!

After that, I was in full throttle…. I spent half an hour on the phone arguing with the Tucson Water Company, another 20 minutes pleading with AT&T to reverse $800+ in international roaming charges I did not incur because my phone was out of commission for the four days I was away, I unpacked, did six loads of laundry, picked up and dropped off dry cleaning, made a visit to the super market with meal plans for the entire week, (what can I say, when I can’t sleep, I make lists) took Lucas to swim lessons and a toy store to buy a birthday present (was I gluten for punishment, or what?), played umpteen rounds of Go Fish and read dozens of books while Lucas sat on the potty and lastly, I made a pile of back to school items my little preschooler needs for his big day tomorrow.

There truly is nothing like coming home or being reunited with your family and routine. I live for all three. 

Hugs and kisses, catching up on my weekend and theirs, sharing photos and presenting souvenirs as gifts, shaking sand out of travel bags and wringing out swimsuits and stowing away suitcases, followed by more hugs and kisses.

I couldn’t stay away from these three if I tried.

As a side note, I am very proud of Lucas, he (almost) made it through the entire day today in underwear. My head is of course pounding from hearing myself ask, “Do you have to use the potty?” 900 times and I’m only mad at myself for his one accident.

I’d say I earned uno mas cerveza.

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Filed Under: beach, family, friends, home, me time, photos, potty training, praise, travel, vacation Tagged With: beach, family, friends, home, me time, photos, potty training, praise, travel, vacation

Vacation Highlights

Posted on June 7, 2012 Written by Tonya

Trust me, I hate hearing about other people’s vacations just as much as the next gal, so I’ll just share the highlights from ours….

In case you missed it, we spent last week in North Carolina attending a wedding in Lake Lure and stayed at the inn where parts of Dirty Dancing was filmed.

Johnny's Cabin (and no, we did not stay here).

We were expecting it to be muggy and gross but instead it was mild and gorgeous, but as with all vacations there were ups and downs. I’ll let you decide which is which.

  • Four hotels in six days is a lot of work with luggage and a three year old.
  • I forgot to pack a hat, towels, beach toys, but was able to purchase all for $40.00. Grrr.
  • Those mountain ranges are beautiful, but the winding roads led to Lucas’ first experience with car sickness, which led to me washing out his soiled clothes and newly acquired towels in a public fountain. It was awesome. My husband took pictures.
  • None of us ever adjusted to the time difference so we didn’t make it to breakfast once (not even the free kind). Dry cereal in our hotel room does not count!
  • Speaking of eating, Lucas ate mac ‘n cheese for all but one meal. Can you say: super embarrassing and not always easy to accommodate?
  • I came home with two mysterious bug bites.
  • Reading the same three children’s books over and over and over again gets old really fast.
  • Over the course of three days, we were in a swimming pool, a lake and a splash pad.
  • One Lightening McQueen was thrown into a fish pond at the lovely Charlotte Airport Sheraton. Luckily, it was retrievable.
  • One of us (ME) missed the wedding ceremony because another one of us (LUCAS) was napping (see bullet point above about time difference adjustment).
  • Too much BBQ, hush puppies and sweet tea were enjoyed.

One of the many reasons I adore traveling is meeting new people and learning something unexpected each day I’m away from home. I suppose I don’t have to travel to do that, but I seem to be more open to it when I’m living out of a suitcase. Here are those highlights:

  • An iPhone can be thrown 20 feet across a room (don’t ask, it was not one of my finest moments) and still work 24 hours later. Those 24 hours were touch-and-go and there was nothing but a black screen and a few tears on on my part, but it came back to me stronger than ever.
  • Brazil has the second largest population of Japanese people (next to Japan, of course) in the world. [wedding reception convo]
  • The most visited winery in the United States isn’t located in Napa Valley. It’s at Biltmore Estate, in the mountains of North Carolina, where approximately 1 million visitors stop by to sample award-winning estate wines each year. Grapes can be imported for processing and bottling to a place that has perfect climate or making wine.
  • A couple having a dinner at a table next to us made a point of coming over to our table to welcome us to North Carolina after overhearing us talk about our home. Southern hospitality truly exists.
  • Newborn puppies can die from something tragic called Fading Puppy Syndrome (again, don’t ask).
  • Once you get home from a vacation and look through all the photos you took, there won’t be a single shot of the entire family together.
  • There is no place like home!

Me completely geeking out on the audio tour at Biltmore Estate.

One of the best parts of our trip for me was of course being together as a family but I also thoroughly enjoyed (as exhibited in the photo above) visiting Biltmore House and Gardens in Asheville. Completed in 1895, George Vanderbilt’s 250-room chateau is as impressive today as it was more than a century ago. Biltmore House is truly an architectural and historical wonder.

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Filed Under: books, family, home, hotels, iphone, list, random, summer, travel, update, vacation, weather, wedding Tagged With: books, family, home, hotels, iphone, list, random, summer, travel, update, vacation, weather, wedding

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