move

Home – NaBloPoMo

Posted on November 24, 2015 Written by Tonya

I have had 30 different homes.

I’ve lived with my mom and dad, my sister, dogs, cats, fish, roommates that became friends, boyfriends that became husbands, husbands that became fathers and two adorable children.

It doesn’t matter how many addresses I’ve had, they say home is where the heart is and they’re right.

Home is also where I can drink cereal milk straight from the bowl, remove my bra, pile my hair in a messy bun on top of my head, stay in jammies all day on Sunday’s and collapse into a bed where I know I’ll get a good night sleep.

Home is where every sound is familiar and comforting; my husband’s keys in the front door, Lola talking quietly in her crib, airplanes flying overhead starting at 7AM.

Home is shelter, a safe haven and a soft place to land, relax, live, eat, laugh and enjoy a glass of Cabernet.

I asked Lucas what home meant to him and he said, “my blanket, my room, and the people in it.” Perfect.

Today is the second anniversary of our family living in our current home, a house we patiently waited to be built. Lucas and I drove by it so many times leading up to our move-in date and just stared, both of us imagining our lives within its walls and under its roof. I took pictures of the progress and we talked about the life we’d make here.

Our house. October 24, 2013. One month before we moved in.

Our house on October 24, 2013, one month before we moved in.

Two years and so many memories.

Our home today, November 24, 2015.

I love my house but it’s the people I share it with that make it my home.

Dorothy was spot-on: There’s no place like it. As we journey through life―dodging the occasional wicked witch―it’s comforting to know that a cozy bed, loving arms, and perhaps even a Munchkin or two await, just across the threshold. – Real Simple

One Year Ago

Posted on November 20, 2014 Written by Tonya

It was the week of Thanksgiving.

I was 30 weeks pregnant.

We were surrounded by boxes. So many boxes!

We were beyond grateful to bid farewell to the small apartment we had lived in for nine months.

Our search for a new home had finally come to an end.

A year ago, as we fell into bed exhausted we listened to the sounds we are now accustomed to coming from our house and neighborhood and dreamed of filling cupboards and closets, covering the walls with our favorite art and photographs, furnishing a nursery and making family memories.

My belly was big and round and my back ached but I was happy. I was anxious to be settled, decorate for the holidays and mail our Christmas cards, which included our new address.

I can’t believe we have been in this house for a year. It seems so much smaller now and there are things we still want to (and need to) do. I guess that happens once you grow comfortable in your space.

In many ways our lives are the same as they were a year ago, but in the best ways, they have changed.

Yes, we really do have a white picket fence.

Complete

Posted on May 5, 2014 Written by Tonya

Flowers have started to bloom in the front yard and the trees have grown in the back.

We know which rooms get the most sunlight during the hottest part of the day.

The furniture in the living room has been rearranged for better flow. Twice.

Our belongings fill every cupboard and closet.

In the middle of the night the sounds aren’t so foreign.

We’ve met our neighbors, mailman and trash collectors.

We’ve learned the quickest route to the freeway and have a favorite restaurant within walking distance.

We are settling in.

Our new house isn’t so new anymore.

We have been here since mid-November and at the time, it was all about getting ready for Thanksgiving and then rushing to put up Christmas decorations and host the holiday (which sounds way more dramatic than it was… It was just my in laws, sister and her boyfriend for a couple of days) and then we were eager to take down decorations and focus wait for the baby.

Lola arrived the end of January and our house suddenly felt more like a home.

My husband put her crib together last weekend and her room is slowly starting to come together.

But it was only once we started putting pictures up on the walls recently that we started to feel more comfortable, like this was home, the right purchase for our family and a place where we could stay a while and make beautiful memories.

It’s a lovely process, making a house a home and truly feeling like your house is home.

Or maybe I’m just starting to feel more complete than I have in a long while.

A Week Of Milestones

Posted on December 16, 2013 Written by Tonya

Hello friends, it has been a while. Almost an entire month in fact and in that time, we moved, decorated for Christmas, surpassed the critical 32 week point of my pregnancy (!) and were without Internet access for almost three weeks. It has been busy and we are anything but settled into our new home, but have already had guests, are hosting family and friends for Christmas and are enjoying making our house a home.

I’m currently sitting at the island in my beautiful new kitchen listening to holiday music, avoiding my very lengthy To Do list and thinking back on a week of some pretty big milestones for Lucas:

Milestone #1 For the first time EVER, Lucas ate what we ate for dinner!

Before becoming a parent I always said I would never be a short order cook, serving up a separate meal for my child, but having such a picky eater that was not the case in the least bit and until last Tuesday, that’s just what we did.

Tuesday he enjoyed pesto pasta with chicken and broccoli.

This is huge!

No separate meal.

I know it won’t happen every night, but we are headed in the right (and way more convenient) direction.

Milestone #2 While out to dinner on Saturday evening, Lucas asked to use the men’s restroom (gulp), which led to me sending this tweet while I waited (and worries):

I don’t know what the appropriate age is to let your son use the restroom by himself, but I know that I won’t be doing it again unless it is a another single stall situation.

Milestone #3 There are very few things in my life that I have had to have. These shoes purchased long before Lucas was even born were one of those things.

I completely fell in love with this New Balance sneaker, size 12(!) decked out with Oscar the Grouch, complete with several pesky flies. On the bottom of the sole, it says: “Have a yucky day!”. Having grown up watching Sesame Street, I just had to get them!

We bought them while in Old Town Pasadena in the Spring of 2009 and never thought our little boy would ever be able to wear them.

At 4 1/2 years old, Lucas’s tiny feet grew and grew are finally big enough to wear them!

Be still my heart, my little boy is no longer so little.

Worth The Wait

Posted on November 20, 2013 Written by Tonya

Around the fifth month of pregnancy, the “nesting” stage sets in. This uncontrollable urge to clean one’s house and prepare for a new baby includes tying up loose ends and kicking into über organization mode. It’s a burst of energy and can lead to some pretty irrational thinking, or so I’m told. I’m well past this stage and have been fighting it for weeks because I have nothing to nest…. yet (we move this weekend!!).

People, I’m kind of going crazy.

I’m beyond excited to move, but my mind is reeling!!

In fact, my dear sweet husband calmly pointed out recently that I’m not losing it, I’ve lost it.

He’s right.

While I have had the best pregnancy, my hormones are completely out of whack right now and everything is rubbing me the wrong way, my expectations are higher than ever, I’m on edge, have a To Do list a mile long, the holidays are fast approaching, which sends me into a tail spin every year, I haven’t had an uninterrupted night of sleep in days due to a cough I just can’t shake and I have officially entered the waddle stage of my pregnancy.

We had a family/maternity photo shoot two weekends ago and our photographer and friend, Tereza gently reminded me how far we’ve come to have this baby and hearing this was equal parts satisfying, humbling and exciting, not to mention tremendously bittersweet.

I believe she captured all that and more. Thank you, Tereza from the bottom of my heart.

All photos taken by Tereza Harper – November 10, 2013

When Todd and I decided to grow our family, we thought it would be easy, just like when we had Lucas – have sex and get pregnant. Little did we know the journey that we were in store for. Ultimately, it made us a stronger couple and family and we have learned to love more deeply and cherish our gifts. Somewhere in the back on my mind, I knew it would all be worth it in the end.

All photos taken by Tereza Harper – November 10, 2013

The longer you wait for something the more you appreciate it when you get it because anything worth having is always worth the wait – Unknown

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Day 20: Today I’m grateful for people with whom I vehemently disagree but can always have a good, respectful debate that never feels personal or resentful. It’s all about keeping an open mind and listening. #30daysofgratitude

Almost Ours

Posted on November 4, 2013 Written by Tonya

I had an amazing childhood. My parents worked in American International schools and I got to live in many different parts of the world. I loved moving from country to country, meeting interesting people, experiencing unique cultures, customs and foods, but there was always a part of me that wished we could have stayed put for a while, built roots and had a home base.

And this house?

This is the house I wish I had grown up in.

This is the house that my husband and I will raise our family in.

This house is almost ours.

After eight l o n g months, our days of apartment living are finally coming to an end!!

Our new home has four bedrooms, including an in-law suite (!), three bathrooms, one of which is a Jack and Jill bathroom that I have always dreamed of, a gorgeous walk-in closet, a custom dog run for Charlie Pasta, a nice size yard and is back in the neighborhood we want to be in. Time for us to payback on play dates, dinners and holiday gatherings!

We are so excited, grateful and relieved we found something just in time for baby girl’s arrival.

The next few weeks are going to be crazy busy with packing, unpacking, decorating for the holidays, gearing up for baby and making this house our home. I can’t wait!!

Day 4: There are many, many things I won’t miss about apartment life, but topping the list is not having an assigned parking spot. I will not miss circling our complex after a late night event, holding my breath and cursing to myself trying to find a spot, or having to park half a mile away. I can’t wait to have a driveway and a garage again! Seriously, it’s the little things. #30daysofgratitude

Just Thinking Out Loud…

Posted on August 5, 2013 Written by Tonya

Okay, so bear with me, this is a random post in order for me to purge… I have a lot on my mind these days. Stupid, ridiculous, trivial crap and big, life changing, important stuff too. I think it’s imperative to get it all out sometimes, so here goes:

First and foremost, how in the hell is it already August?

Only 34 days until my next Dave Matthews concert… not that I’m counting or anything.

Moving. Or more importantly, finding our (close to and within our budget) dream house. Open living space, big backyard, guest room (or not), Jack & Jill bathroom, two-story (or not) and back in our old neighborhood. It’s not that much to ask for, is it? And yet, we have looked at dozens of houses and haven’t quite fallen in love with any and if we have, they were bought within days or hours of us seeing them.

Dog training. Charlie Pasta is having a hard time and will be going away for training for two weeks later this month and I am absolutely thrilled!! He hates apartment living as much as I do and has decided to act out and turn skittish (AKA bark like a maniac at every noise he hears). We’ve become very frustrated and turns out are not the best dog trainers, so it’s time for professional intervention.

North West. When and how are Kim & Kanye going to introduce their daughter to the world? I’m so curious. Unless, they have already and I’ve been living under a rock?

I’m so happy America’s Next Top Model is back!! Cycle 20, baby!! This time it’s girls vs. boys. No judging… you know you watch it or something equally embarrassing, right? Right?!

Speaking of embarrassing TV, another guilty pleasure show that I have gotten sucked into this summer is Mistresses. It’s so bad.

How many times does a day does “Blurred Lines” play on the radio and how soon before it really starts to bother me that my four year knows almost every lyric?

There is more substance to me than bad television and pop songs, I am currently OBSESSED with This American Life, the weekly public radio show broadcast and I recently downloaded the app and have listened to some of the most amazing stories from learning how to count cards in order to beat casinos to the love of summer camp and an incredible story about babies switched at birth only to find out 40 years later. The host, Ira Glass is my new hero.

I’m looking forward to the day when I don’t have to hear “butt”, “poop” and “pee” 900 times a day or reprimand someone for using them in excess. Seriously, how do you make it stop?!

There is definitely a lot more going on in this brain of mine, but this really helped. For now…

What’s on your mind?

#ApartmentLiving

Posted on June 21, 2013 Written by Tonya

Remember a few weeks ago when I was bitching up a storm and said that I could provide an entire blog post about all the things I dislike about apartment living? Without further adieu….

The Top 10 Things I Dislike About #ApartmentLiving:

10. I’m 10 years too old for this shit! I’ve lived in my fair share of apartments (six to date beginning at age 20 in college) and it gets old real fast. There’s no privacy, lots of noise and very little space. I know it’s only temporary, but I’ve done my time in apartments and I’m over it!

9. We’re on the third floor with NO elevator (a fact that we did not learn until the day before we moved in)! Think groceries, sleeping child in the car and the transfer, etc.

8. No (personal) yard.

7. Limited storage space, resulting in not one but three separate storage units (don’t ask) including our one car garage.

6. No room for overnight guests (wait, is that really a bad thing?).

5. Our dishwasher is as big as a small Igloo ice chest, as in the size you bring to work for lunch so it gets run at least three times a week.

4. It is nearly impossible to find a parking spot after 9:30 at night. More than once I have had to park at least a 1/2 mile away from my front door.

3. We have a dog who refuses to use his porch potty (see #9).

2. We are constantly on Lucas’ case about his noise level and romping around, which is so unfair to him. He’s four and a boy and loud!

1. I mentioned the noise level, but the fights we overhear, yelling at the TV during major sporting events and pretty much constant barking dogs can really make one go crazy.

I digress… It’s not all bad! I can’t believe it’s already been three months. We have awesome swimming pools, a state of the art gym, free weekly yoga class, maintenance staff that responds quickly and we’re all together. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter where we live as long as we have that.

But, I’m still counting down. I have a countdown calendar running on my phone and as of this very minute, we only have 132 days left.

Provided we can find a house!!

Moving By The Numbers

Posted on March 14, 2013 Written by Tonya

1 yard sale.

2 broken finger nails.

2 trips to Home Depot.

2 guys and a truck.

3rd floor. No elevator!

4 rolls of tape.

5 days without TV or Internet (thank God for free WiFi).

5 nights of take out.

5 trips to Goodwill.

10 wardrobe boxes.

12 overpriced newspapers purchased and used to wrap ~~my precious wine glasses~~ dishes.

28 boxes.

Countless curse words uttered, trips to our storage unit and glasses of wine drank.

Have I mentioned how much I hate moving?!

But, last night in our new apartment (gulp) I slept better than I have in a long time because the hard part is behind us. I hope…

Now on to house hunting!

One red wall.

Change Is (Mostly) Good

Posted on February 25, 2013 Written by Tonya

I can’t believe we have to move.

Even though I knew it was coming, it feels like the rug has been pulled out from underneath me.

My chest is cramping with stress and the lists running through my head are giving me the spins.

The last few days have been chaos amidst boxes and packing tape, furniture pads and piles.

So many piles.

We’ve decided whether to save, sell, donate or store countless items.

Another new address.

Temporary, but still.

Change.

I don’t like change.

Especially on top of all our regular everyday stresses…

Deadlines.

Appointments.

Trips to the grocery store.

Laundry.

Late nights.

Early mornings.

Errands.

Exercise.

Phone calls to make and return.

Full In Boxes.

Bills.

Lunches to prepare.

A chipped tooth and an emergency visit to the dentist.

Infertility treatments.

A dog with warts in his mouth (Ugh. Don’t ask!).

Birthday presents to purchase.

Swim lessons.

Responsibilities.

Life.

But, I don’t have any more going on in my life than you, in fact your To Do list probably looks a lot like mine. Sure the tasks may differ, but the intent behind the reminders is the same and I’m sure the strong desire to cross items off is too!

The older I get the more I realize change can be exciting and a move doesn’t have to be all that stressful. It’s a huge pain-in-the-ass, but I know it’ll all get done.

Plus, there’s a lot of really great stuff going on right now too. Lucas, for one is very excited about living in an apartment complex that has not one, but three pools! We are looking forward to a fun Spring and Summer and finding a house by Fall.

I’m not going to be posting here as much over the next few weeks, so bear with me. Having said that, my infertility column over at SheKnows is still of the utmost importance to me and you can find a new post there every Monday through May. Today’s offering is Acupuncture for infertility: On pins and needles. Please read and share!

Home – NaBloPoMo

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