Letters For Lucas

Wonders, Mishaps, Blunders and Joy.. commentary on my life as a mom in the form of letters to my son

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Let’s Here It For June!

Posted on June 1, 2015 Written by Tonya

I love turning the calendar on a new month, but especially June! June is full of happy.

Today is Charlie Pasta’s third birthday and from the moment I first held him, I knew he was meant to be ours. He drives me absolutely bananas 90 percent of the time, but he’s loyal and sweet, great with my children, my husband’s best friend and super cute, so our love/hate relationship will continue forever.

pupJune also marks the end of the school year and Lucas is just days from graduating from Kindergarten and turning six! His Golden Birthday is Saturday. I can’t believe either. As much as I enjoy starting a new month, I wish time could be paused.

Lucas has grown so much this school year! He has fallen deeper in love with books, insists on reading to us most nights, writes his own adventure stories, has discovered Skylanders, is an awesome big brother to Lola and has started exerting his opinion, space and will in a very big way.

Case and point:

door

The current sign on Lucas’s door.

I’m looking forward to a fun summer. O_o

To help alleviate some of the stress, my in-laws will be in town all summer, allowing them an opportunity to get to know the other half of the state better and spend quality time with their grandchildren. Yay!! We are grateful for their help.

Lastly, June is my birthday month! I’ll be 43 on June 26 and this morning my In Box was flooded with cool discounts and free stuff. If you didn’t know you could celebrate your special day all month long, read this post I wrote a couple of years ago: A Month Long Celebration. Free stuff is great and all, but I’m excited about a birthday weekend getaway with my husband. We haven’t decided where to yet, but there will be sun and cocktails and lounging by the pool!

It’s going to be quite the month!! What are you looking forward to in June?

Related Posts:

  • Summer So Far
  • This Time It’s Personal
  • She’s Here!

Filed Under: grandparents, milestones, photos, puppy, question, summer Tagged With: grandparents, milestones, photos, puppy, question, summer

Old School Blogging: Full-On Random

Posted on March 13, 2015 Written by Tonya

I’m linking up with Elaine of The Miss Elaine-ous Life and Julia from Wine in Mom for a little Old School Blogging and today and it is going to get random!

1. If you could be on a reality show which one would you choose?
None! I’m not a fan of reality TV. I think most of it scripted so there’s nothing really “real” about it and it completely salacious and I feel so embarrassed for whomever is  being featured. If I had to choose though it’d be Chopped. I’d be the first one kicked off, but I would have a hell of a time with that first basket of mystery items!

2. Name one thing you have saved from your childhood?
I’m a sentimental fool and I’ve saved tons of stuff from my childhood; concert ticket stubs, playbill, favorite dolls, Barbies, and my Raggedy Ann & Andy blankie.

3. If your life had a theme song what would it be?
That’s a hard one, I associate with so many different songs for all the different chapters of my life. I wrote a post called The Soundtrack Of My Life back in 2010 and revisiting it, the only song I’d add is A Thousand Years by Christina Perri because it wouldn’t be my life without it. Incidentally, for the back story on that, I wrote Live & In Person.

4. Where is your happy place?
I’m a homebody by nature, but I gain such peace and clarity by being at the beach.

beachlove

5. What is one thing about your home that you and your spouse disagree on?
Our dog. Hands-down the worst mistake I’ve ever made in my life was getting a dog and my husband and I argue about him, his care, his behavior, his hair, and his actions all the time!! We don’t argue about anything else.

6. What is your favorite fruit?
Granny Smith apples.

7. Bowtie or regular tie?
I used to work for a complete dick tyrant who wore a bowtie so I’m going with regular.

8. Mexican or Italian (food, not men)?
Hardest question ever. Seriously, how is one to choose? Too much good stuff… Penne all’Arrabbiata, bruschetta, cannoli, chianti, salsa, enchiladas, tequila. Moving on.

9. Where do you want to go on summer vacation?
Anywhere in Europe, but my desire to return to Paris is growing greater by the day! It’s my husband and my favorite city in the world and we are anxious to take our children, but we want them to love it as much as we do so the timing has to be just right!

10. What are your go-to shoes in your closet?
After almost 20 years in SoCal, that’s easy, flip-flops!

Related Posts:

  • Old School Blogging: I Am
  • Old School Blogging: Reflections
  • Old School Blogging: The ABC’s Of Me

Filed Under: beach, blog hop, list, marriage, music, old school blogging, puppy, question, random, travel Tagged With: beach, blog hop, list, marriage, music, old school blogging, puppy, question, random, The Miss Elaine-ous Life, travel

She’s Here!

Posted on February 10, 2014 Written by Tonya

She’s here! She’s here! I am thrilled, grateful, full of joy and so, so much love. There truly are no words to describe how happy I am to finally have this tiny baby girl in my arms.

However…

between constipation, engorged boobs, sore nipples, painful pumping sessions, lack of sleep, not being able to move around comfortably, swollen feet and hands, stitches, burning sensation in my abdomen, multiple bouts of crying throughout the day, not being able to drive for two weeks, an over active pre-schooler, mounds of laundry, an insatiable thirst and crazy out of whack hormones, postpartum days really suck.

On the other hand, there is a very supportive and helpful husband, an understanding 4-year-old, in-laws to look after Lucas, a sweet and curious dog, friends who visit bearing gifts, meals, sound advice and laughter, doctors and specialists who know better, breast feeding support groups, pain medication, cabbage (if you have ever breast fed, you’ll understand), time and moments like this:

sibling love
It was worth the wait and worth all the postpartum BS. Bring it… I’m getting stronger every day and slowly healing.

I will share Lola Paige’s birth story soon and more photos, but blogging will be intermittent for the next few weeks as I’ll be busy snuggling my newborn miracle. Thank you for understanding.

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  • The Wedding
  • Taking Care Of Business
  • 10 Things To Smile About

Filed Under: annoyances, family, friends, grandparents, gratitude, health, motherhood, photos, pregnancy2, puppy, siblings, TBW Tagged With: annoyances, family, friends, grandparents, gratitude, health, motherhood, photos, pregnancy2, puppy, siblings, TBW

Pet Peeve

Posted on October 23, 2013 Written by Tonya

We have a Brittany and he is very smart.

He’s also extremely energetic, completely neurotic, overly sensitive, a disgusting poop eater, can’t be trusted with dog toys because he’ll destroy them and is too cute for words.

IMG_5134 - Version 2

He adores my husband and tolerates me. I’m on his case a lot because I am the only one in my house disciplining him spend the most time with him. 

At only a year and four months old, Charlie Pasta is still a puppy in many ways and has a lot to learn. To be fair, so do we. Dog ownership is a lot harder than I ever imagined. Turns out it is way more expensive too!

I recently took to Facebook with one of my many and easily most frustrating puppy gripes…

Screen Shot 2013-10-21 at 3.22.15 PM

We are now on bed #11. Needless to say, the bitter apple spray didn’t no a damn thing to refrain this mutt.


This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop, Prompt 4. Your pets least likable character trait.

Related Posts:

  • 10 Reasons NOT To Get A Puppy
  • One Week
  • She’s Here!

Filed Under: annoyances, challenges, mama kat's writer's workshop, puppy Tagged With: annoyances, challenges, mama kat's writer's workshop, puppy

One Year Ago

Posted on August 14, 2013 Written by Tonya

I love the old adage, “the more things change, the more they stay the same” because in life there are many, many things that should never change.

For example and just to name a few: my favorite bagel shop should never under any circumstances stop making their scrumptious cinnamon sugar bagels because even though I don’t indulge in one very often, I love just knowing they are there and they smell insane.

I believe champagne should always be popped when there’s something fabulous to celebrate and even when there’s not.

I think goofy games should always be played at baby showers no matter how much the guests and typically the guest of honor bitch about them.

Sesame Street should never go off the air, even though my son has never been a fan.

I especially hope my husband never ceases to make me laugh and my son always prefers to sit next to me instead of across form me when we are at a restaurant.

Dependability is nice, tradition is comforting, being surrounded by people and things you can trust and count on is very good and support and unconditional love is priceless, but looking back just one year ago, almost everything in my life is different, some WAY better, some WAY worse. 

Exactly one year ago today I posted Letter to my Blogging Buddies by Alison of Writing, Wishing as part of my weekly series, Letters For You, I was desperately in love with and getting to know our new puppy, Charlie Pasta, I was trying to find the good in myself and making lists. I wasn’t sharing much else.

Only six of the 11 posts I published last August were mine, all the others were guest posts. So far this month, I’ve written nine posts, including this one so I’m sharing more, which can only be healthy for my psyche.

I think.

Since August, 2012, we have moved and are now living miserably uncomfortably in a teeny tiny apartment as we search for our dream house and I’m still getting to know our dog, who turns out is A LOT more work than my four year old and I regret getting almost daily.

Charlie Pasta and I are NOT in a good place these days, although as he sleeps peacefully at my feet as I type this, I realize I really do love him.

How has your life changed in the last year?

And what are some things you hope never change? I asked this on Twitter the other day and all I heard was crickets, so won’t you please indulge me?


This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop Prompt #3. What were you blogging about last year at this time? What has changed?

Related Posts:

  • This Time Last Year
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Filed Under: blog, change, Letters For You, mama kat's writer's workshop, puppy, question, twitter, update Tagged With: blog, change, Letters For You, mama kat's writer's workshop, puppy, question, twitter, update

Just Thinking Out Loud…

Posted on August 5, 2013 Written by Tonya

Okay, so bear with me, this is a random post in order for me to purge… I have a lot on my mind these days. Stupid, ridiculous, trivial crap and big, life changing, important stuff too. I think it’s imperative to get it all out sometimes, so here goes:

  • First and foremost, how in the hell is it already August?
  • Only 34 days until my next Dave Matthews concert… not that I’m counting or anything.
  • Moving. Or more importantly, finding our (close to and within our budget) dream house. Open living space, big backyard, guest room (or not), Jack & Jill bathroom, two-story (or not) and back in our old neighborhood. It’s not that much to ask for, is it? And yet, we have looked at dozens of houses and haven’t quite fallen in love with any and if we have, they were bought within days or hours of us seeing them.
  • Dog training. Charlie Pasta is having a hard time and will be going away for training for two weeks later this month and I am absolutely thrilled!! He hates apartment living as much as I do and has decided to act out and turn skittish (AKA bark like a maniac at every noise he hears). We’ve become very frustrated and turns out are not the best dog trainers, so it’s time for professional intervention. 
  • North West. When and how are Kim & Kanye going to introduce their daughter to the world? I’m so curious. Unless, they have already and I’ve been living under a rock?
  • I’m so happy America’s Next Top Model is back!! Cycle 20, baby!! This time it’s girls vs. boys. No judging… you know you watch it or something equally embarrassing, right? Right?!
  • Speaking of embarrassing TV, another guilty pleasure show that I have gotten sucked into this summer is Mistresses. It’s so bad.
  • How many times does a day does “Blurred Lines” play on the radio and how soon before it really starts to bother me that my four year knows almost every lyric?
  • There is more substance to me than bad television and pop songs, I am currently OBSESSED with This American Life, the weekly public radio show broadcast and I recently downloaded the app and have listened to some of the most amazing stories from learning how to count cards in order to beat casinos to the love of summer camp and an incredible story about babies switched at birth only to find out 40 years later. The host, Ira Glass is my new hero.
  • I’m looking forward to the day when I don’t have to hear “butt”, “poop” and “pee” 900 times a day or reprimand someone for using them in excess. Seriously, how do you make it stop?!

There is definitely a lot more going on in this brain of mine, but this really helped. For now…

What’s on your mind?

Related Posts:

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  • Thank You’s
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Filed Under: celebs, DMB, list, move, puppy, question, random, TV Tagged With: celebs, DMB, list, move, puppy, question, random, TV

#ApartmentLiving

Posted on June 21, 2013 Written by Tonya

Remember a few weeks ago when I was bitching up a storm and said that I could provide an entire blog post about all the things I dislike about apartment living? Without further adieu….

The Top 10 Things I Dislike About #ApartmentLiving:

10. I’m 10 years too old for this shit! I’ve lived in my fair share of apartments (six to date beginning at age 20 in college) and it gets old real fast. There’s no privacy, lots of noise and very little space. I know it’s only temporary, but I’ve done my time in apartments and I’m over it!

9. We’re on the third floor with NO elevator (a fact that we did not learn until the day before we moved in)! Think groceries, sleeping child in the car and the transfer, etc.

8. No (personal) yard.

7. Limited storage space, resulting in not one but three separate storage units (don’t ask) including our one car garage.

6. No room for overnight guests (wait, is that really a bad thing?).

5. Our dishwasher is as big as a small Igloo ice chest, as in the size you bring to work for lunch so it gets run at least three times a week.

4. It is nearly impossible to find a parking spot after 9:30 at night. More than once I have had to park at least a 1/2 mile away from my front door.

3. We have a dog who refuses to use his porch potty (see #9).

2. We are constantly on Lucas’ case about his noise level and romping around, which is so unfair to him. He’s four and a boy and loud!

1. I mentioned the noise level, but the fights we overhear, yelling at the TV during major sporting events and pretty much constant barking dogs can really make one go crazy.

I digress… It’s not all bad! I can’t believe it’s already been three months. We have  awesome swimming pools, a state of the art gym, free weekly yoga class, maintenance staff that responds quickly and we’re all together. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter where we live as long as we have that.

But, I’m still counting down. I have a countdown calendar running on my phone and as of this very minute, we only have 132 days left.

Provided we can find a house!!

photo

 

 

Related Posts:

  • No Dogs Allowed?
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Filed Under: annoyances, family, home, list, move, puppy Tagged With: annoyances, apartment living, family, home, list, move, puppy

This Dog

Posted on May 15, 2013 Written by Tonya

I wanted another baby, but got a puppy instead.

I have often wondered what the hell I was thinking!

Lucas helped name him Charlie Pasta.

This dog.

This beautiful dog and I first locked eyes when Charlie was just 23 days old. Back then he was named Logan (he is so NOT a Logan). He came home with us 45 days later and has been a bona fide member of our family ever since. Charlie has tested my patience in more ways than my son and I am not kidding. There have been many days that this dog was lucky to live through.

Puppies are a lot of work and this particular breed is no different. Brittany’s are equal parts energetic, cute and smart. I am really wishing I had known how energetic! As a bird dog, Charlie is always on high alert sniffing out EVERYTHING!! He has a difficult time relaxing, loves having a task, enjoys taking very l o n g walks and his favorite place to be is in the center of our king size bed; on the sheets not on the comforter. Watching him pull the comforter down is hilarious.

I like to compare Charlie to an obsessive boyfriend, always wanting/needing to be right by my side. I like him laying under my feet as I write, but often will trip over him the second I get up because he will too.

Charlie Pasta loves Lucas, tolerates me and ADORES my husband. Yeah, the guy that refused to get a dog has a canine BFF.

I’ve written about Charlie Pasta before here and here and here and have posted tons of photos all over the interwebs.

I can’t believe our puppy turns a year old on June 1. You better believe there will be a dog-friendly cake, lots of treats and pats, a new chew toy or two and if he’s lucky, I’ll pull the comforter back for him.

charliepasta


This post was written for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop Prompt #1: Introduce a pet. 

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Filed Under: family, mama kat's writer's workshop, photos, puppy Tagged With: family, mama kat's writer's workshop, photos, puppy

A Belated Valentine To My Dog

Posted on February 16, 2013 Written by Tonya

Dear Charlie Pasta,

You came right to me.

You chose me.

Out of all your equally adorable little brothers and sisters, you stumbled your way to me. I didn’t want an orange and white Brittany, I wanted a liver (chocolate) and white. But your little face won me over. Thank goodness you couldn’t see very well yet because I was a fright having just spend several days taking care of a sick toddler. I don’t even think I showered the day we met.

You were barely a month old but I knew I wanted you too.

My God, what I was thinking?!

I was so insistent on adding you to our family, I literally begged and pleaded with Todd for months! Oh yeah, I hate to break it to you but your BFF didn’t want a dog. He fights to keep you now, so you’re safe.

Over the last six months you have tried my patience beyond belief and we are still struggling to find some common ground.

You’re a puppy, I get it, but for the love of all the leaves and birds you chase in our backyard, the holes you enjoy digging so much, the chicken flavored treats you adore, the dirty socks you hoard and all the rounds of fetch I have played with you, please calm the fuck down!!

We have been told that your breed is an “energetic” one, that you require lots of exercise, thrive on having a task and find it difficult to relax. You and I should be getting along famously because that describes me to a T.

Alas, we don’t.

Yet.

I know we’ll turn a corner soon and until then, I’ll try to have more patience with you, my sweet little freckle faced friend.

As long as you keep looking at me with a cock-eyed head when it’s 2 minutes past your feeding time and the lower half of your body shakes to one side when you wag your tail, I’ll keep taking you on long walks, searching high and low for more challenging (and indestructible) toys and picking up your poop. Deal?

In spite of our similarities, I love you and all the fury, frustration and fun you have brought to our family.

You have never cared what I look like or if I’m happy, sad, sick or frazzled. You chose me.

Love,
Me

P.S. In the middle of writing this, I left you outside unsupervised for five minutes and you dug a hole, asshole!

download

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Filed Under: family, holidays, love, my letters, puppy Tagged With: family, holidays, love, my letters, puppy

No Dogs Allowed?

Posted on February 4, 2013 Written by Tonya

Recently our landlady found out we have a puppy. We’re guessing it was the photo on our holiday card. See below. 

According to our Renters Agreement, no pets are allowed. I thought my husband had cleared Charlie Pasta’s arrival with her over the summer, but apparently he did not. After berating him (my husband, not the dog) over the phone, she insisted on visiting  to inspect the current condition.

We keep a neat house, despite having a toddler and a puppy. A very neat house. I’m a very anal retentive, OCD, type A, controlling organized person and everything in my home has a place, there is very little clutter, beds are made each morning and toys are picked up throughout the day. We have our house professionally cleaned once or twice a month, the dog is crate-trained and rarely unsupervised. He also goes to the groomer once or twice a month, in addition to being bathed at home once a week.

Even with all of the tidiness, getting ready for this woman’s visit was like a Seinfeld episode…

The day before, Todd and I were leaving town for a quick trip to Tucson to check on the work being done at the house my sister and I inheritance from our parents. I was trying to organize the details of Lucas’ care while we would be away. We don’t want either of our two trusted babysitters to be responsible for the dog too, so we decide to board him and at the same time have him neutered. 🙁

Luckily, the day before the visit was also housekeeper day, but while vacuuming, one of them pulled a snag in the carpet in our bedroom that lead to an eight inch long gaping hole.

A frantic phone call to a carpet repair specialist and $75 later the problem was solved. If you’ve ever wondered how holes in carpets are repaired, it’s much like a facelift with stretching and tugging and lots of glue! It’s a fascinating process.

What I kept thinking as we bid our son farewell for 24 hours and headed to the airport was what must a complete stranger think about us upon entering our home. What does our space reveal about us?

Our style is eclectic, mismatched pillows on the couch in our living room, dozens of books on the shelves and magazines on the bedside tables, family and car photos adorn the walls, except in Lucas’ room, which has Dr. Seuss prints and a huge Lucas Oil sign. You’ll find a treadmill and a spin bike in one room and a welcoming guest bed in the another. There are doormats at every door that leads outside. There’s a bowl of fruit on the kitchen counter next to a gourmet style coffee maker. There are several bottles of perfume on the sink in the master bathroom and tons of evidence that not only a child, but also a canine live here too.

What you can’t see when you walk through our house is that we are a family, we are responsible people, parents and pet owners and we respect where we live. Not just on drop by visit days, every day.

010 - Version 2

Although we haven’t heard from her, our landlady came and went and took our February rent check with her, so I guess we are allowed to stay. For now.

EDITED TO ADD: I guess it all comes down to the Renter’s Agreement. Today we received notice that we have 45 days to vacate. Oh joy!

Related Posts:

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Filed Under: annoyances, family, home, move, puppy Tagged With: annoyances, family, home, landlandy, move, puppy

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